love Funny Status Messages

   Screw love? No, screw the person who made you think that way.

   my ex downgraded and I upgraded.love it

   Anybody that says I'll steal your heart, mind, love etc. you definitely aren't allowed in my house. And you will be frisked for knives.

   Her: How deep is your love? Me: 8 inches. 3 if you actually have a ruler with you.

   I love ruining the plot of Dorian Gray for people. Never gets old.

   A Girl commented on my post, a guy replied, she replied again n they were abt 2 fall in Love so I deleted d post.

   If you love Jesus more than your husband then start praying the next time you need a jar open.

   The Story Of Milk: Good milk. Bad milk. Disgusting milk. Dangerous milk. Cheese! I love a happy ending.

   Thought I wanted love. Turns out I just want a tattoo.

   I love you.... and your weed.

   People who always say "love is blind" need to be reminded that Stevie Wonder is divorcing his wife

   I'm just a guy searching for love and someone to bang the hell out of.

   We're born alone, we live alone, we die alone. Only through our love and facebook friendship can we create the illusion for the moment that we're not alone. Orson Welles

   Parents say alcohol is your enemy, God says love your enemy.......

   You know you love your wife if you've ever written a hush money check to a porn star on Valentine's day.

   It's always awkward ending phone calls with people you love. I always say, "I love you" and they're like "Thank you for choosing Domino's Pizza."

   Nails didn't keep Christ to the cross, His love for you did. Have a Happy Easter.

   Love is such a strong word But then again, so is C*NT

   I sometimes eat pizza with a fork... Please love me anyway.

   I love everybody. Even you, insecure person reading this hoping someone loves you … even you.