life Funny Status Messages

   Never break four things in life. Trust. Promise. Relation. And Heart. Because when they break they don't make a noise, but hurts a lot.

   every second becomes a minute, every minute becomes a hour but when your living it up every crazy sh#t you did in your life becomes the best memories.

   You can never rule out the possibility that someone in your life is dead and you've been getting Weekend-at-Bernie'ed.

   A lot of people will disappoint you in life. Don't let any of them be you.

   When life gives you melons you have dyslexia

   thinks life is pleasant, death is peacefull... it's the transition that is troublesome.

   the best things in life...involve rum!

   When you tell a kid "maybe" all they here is "I swear on my life this will DEF happen!"

   making some changes in his life. If your not on my friends list any longer, you were one of the changes........

   these keys I hold in my hand open up a very important part of my life,.. your chastity belt

   Your soulmate is out there. Crying in their car, listening to 90s rap while you waste your life with people you don't even like.

   This is the real me. Full of problems. Full of love. Full of lost. Full of hurt. Full of life. Full of hope. Full of happiness. Most of all.....Full of friends.

   Tell someone you love them today, because life is short. But SHOUT it at them in German, because life is also terrifying and confusing

   And here's another question I would love all you pro abortion people to answer, if a fetus is not a human life as you contend, how the hell does planned parenthood harvest and sell human organs from one?

   I do not look back, the past is over, what's done is done, I thank god for what his given me and ask him to guide my ways towards a life of happiness ♥

   Life gave me onions........ P.S. Onionade sucks.

   People treat New Year’s like some sort of life changing event. If your life sucked yesterday, it’s probably still going to suck today in 2015...

   SHOPPERS: Bored with writing lists for that weekly shop? Simply find discarded lists in trolleys/baskets, and use them! Its spiced up my life.....

   I replied "maybe" to your facebook event out of respect for the inherent uncertainty of life's journey.

   When life throws ten problems at you, it also gives you a hundred reasons to be thankful. Give thanks to God! Have a very happy and safe Thanksgiving!