santa AND presents AND christmas AND xmas AND holidays AND elfs Funny Status Messages

   the best times to have a breakup...christmas, valentines and her birthday

   santa just touched my no no spot. :(

   January: that special time of the year when a children's Xmas toys & his parents are BOTH broke.

   Dear Santa: I would like a bailout and a bonus. I have been really bad this year and therefore I deserve it.

   gonna laugh 2 years from now when all of those people who thought the world was gonna end on Dec. 22, 2012 realize that they are still gonna have to go out and buy Christmas presents.....

   just came back home and found Santa in his mouse trap... My cheese was all gone, but at least the milk and cookies were safe.

   blew all his christmas money on hookers and cocaine.....

   got a head start on Christmas next year, I already have my tree up!

   People are so worried about what they eat between Christmas and the New Year, but they really should be worried about what they eat between the New Year and Christmas.

   Friends are like Christmas lights. Some are broke, others just don't work for you....and there are others that make your day shine bright.

   wants to personally apologize for those that couldn't get their gifts from Santa: He died of laughter when I told him I had been nice all year......

   note to self for next Christmas..... don't leave deer jerky out for Santa - cookies are a better choice...

   Santa is like a repair man, says he will be there between 12 and 4 and shows up at 5. What a jerk

   outsmarted Santa this year... see I need coal to heat my house, so I was extra bad so I would get more coal! Now who's laughing fat guy?

   thinks businesses that make their employees work on Christmas day are from the devil! Except for the gas stations and all of the other businesses I'm going to need today.... those ones are sent from God!

   I think I overdosed on my family.....Santa has the right idea....only visit some ppl once a year.....

   Christ's Hope Rescuing Iniquitous Souls To Miraculously Administer Salvation!!! Thank God for Christmas!!!!

   If you can't figure out what to get someone for Christmas, get them a gift card! It's like saying, "Here's $20... go get your own damn gift!"

   eating Babybels at this special time of year. After all, Christmas just wouldn't be Christmas without the baby cheeses.

   I dont believe in Santa...but with no money in my pocket ....I think I will change my opinion about him.....