love Funny Status Messages

   I love your eyes, but I love mine more...because without them, I won't see yours.

   We say we love and are fully behind our soldiers risking their lives fighting for our freedom and protecting us from our enemies yet we pay them peanuts while we make millionaires out of sportmen, movie stars, Justin Bieber, the Kadarshians, Kanye west.

   I love my wife so much that I use c ondom with other girls.

   I can’t express to you in words how much I love you and that’s why I’m at your house setting up candles and sharpening your knives.

   I love babies wearing sunglasses. They are like little tiny, blind jazz musicians.

   Holding someone accountable is a form of love, too.

   If I work up the courage to tell you I love you...the least you can do is introduce yourself to me dammit.

   I ain't talking about Floyd when I say I love May weather.

   I love being envied and hated! Because no one envies the ugly and nobody hates the weak!

   Love doesn’t walk away, people do.

   Romance works because ladies love dumb stuff and they are easily swayed by meaningless gestures. That's why all dudes have the same technique. It's called lying.

   I would love nothing more than to see the Heat to lose in the first round.

   all I really want is someone to love me as much as kanye west loves himself

   I believe in love at first sight because… I’ve loved my mum since I opened my eyes!

   I love myself, I'm just not "post pictures of myself everyday on Facebook" love myself.

   I dont make love, I slam women like a fridge door with no beer in it.

   There has been a surge in patriotism. These terrorists haven't learned a damn thing. They just don't get it. If they piss off Americans (as they have) our love of country and eventually our wrath will be nothing but awesome.

   Love is like working out it hurts really bad until you just give up and eat a cake.

   I love you so much I increased your life insurance. Now shut up and lets go camping in the bear-infested woods.

   I love you so much I increased your life insurance. Now shut up and drink your poison.