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"Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe."
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08-25-2010 22:18
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...Brad Pitt may favor death penalty after BP oil spill. Says execs should hafta watch “Meet Joe Black” over & over til they kill themselves!
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08-25-2010 22:17 by
The Legal Eagle
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... Knife-wielding intruder tries 2 break into Paris Hilton's home. So? 1 time, a forkwielding Kirstie Alley tried 2 break into my refrigerator!
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08-25-2010 22:16 by
The Legal Eagle
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tired of trying, sick of crying... Yeah, sure I'm smiling, but inside I'm dying...
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08-25-2010 22:16 by
Technoboy
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All I know is I wouldn't do so good in the wizarding world. Every time I encountered a goblin I'd instinctively punt it.
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08-25-2010 22:15 by
Miranda
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trust : is to deal with snakes and to know they wont bite you
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08-25-2010 22:13 by
TechnoBoy
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....Nick Cannon still mum on Mariah pregnancy. They're obviously waiting to make sure she doesn't have a bigger miscarriage than “Glitter.”
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08-25-2010 22:08 by
The Legal Eagle
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Two hats were hanging on a hat rack in the hallway. One hat says to the other, 'You stay here, I'll go on a head.'.
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08-25-2010 22:04
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I drop my ipod:( ………and then my headphones save it's life :)
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08-25-2010 21:41 by
Mark Mckib
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Inside me lives a skinny man crying to get out, but I can usually shut him up with cookies.
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08-25-2010 21:40 by
Mark McKibben
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Show me a piano falling down a mineshaft and I'll show you A-flat minor.
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08-25-2010 21:34
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dropped in an upholstery machine. He is fully re-covered now.
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08-25-2010 21:14 by
Josh
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laughing at "suggested" friends that he will never be friends with
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08-25-2010 21:00 by
tk
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It would be very helpful to me if the rest of you would please stop striving for excellence. Thanks!
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08-25-2010 20:16 by
Aaron
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I use to be great at wordplay. Once a pun a time.
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08-25-2010 20:16 by
Aaron
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if the shoe fits, buy one in every color.
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08-25-2010 20:07
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. . . I know I'm in my own little world, but it's okay, they know I'm here.
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08-25-2010 20:06
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I just opened my wheelie bin and a wasp flew out. Now what kind of sick person would do that?
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08-25-2010 19:21 by
Lard
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I have reasons to believe the term 'More bang for your buck' was first used by Hookers..
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08-25-2010 18:57
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Never go to bed angry - Stay awake and plot your revenge!
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08-25-2010 18:13
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