love Funny Status Messages

   I love the phrase "boobie trapped" I mean, who doesn't like to be trapped by boobies????

   I may hate waiting. But I love procastinating.

   Two red blood cells met and fell in love. But alas,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, it was in vein.

   Late every Sunday night, all other the stores in the mall go and tell Radio Shack not to worry about what other people think, they still love him

   Tell her you'd die without her. Woman love to think you'd die without them.

   My new girlfriend said a small d*ck shouldn't be a problem as long as we truly love each other. This was right before she showed it to me.

   Me: You have a horrible memory ... Wife: Well, I guess that's why I still love you.

   Imma have my own restaurant called Bacon On It....making foods you love with dun dun dun Bacon on it

   why fall in love when you can fall asleep?

   Star Wars fans never get laid because they are looking for love in Alderaan places.

   i love going to church. especially when they pass around free money

   I saw a woman put a chunk of butter in her mouth. Then buttered her corn on the cob by rubbing it on her mouth. I think I might be in love.

   True love is giving your significant other a sip from your beer glass... a real f*cking small sip though... !

   In love, you either win someone's heart or lose your liver... !

   Pets are so easy to love. They are honest and react to kindness without wanting to know what's in your bank. Humans could take a lesson.

   Why is it always the ugly people who have to post pics of themselves every other day? You might love the camera but it’s obvious the camera does not love you back. So put the camera down and stop scaring little children with your pics.

   I'd love to give whoever designed the iPhone 5 a car that refills quickly at the pump but only goes 10 miles before needing another refill

   When I say I'm going to "woo" you, it's a reference to my love for John Woo films, so I'll be punching you & throwing doves in your face.

   I wish someone could love me as much as I love looking forward to my next meal.

   The worst feeling in the world is being in love with somebody that knows how to untie rope and run away while you're napping.