Funny Status Messages and Tweets
Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.
Page: 4910 of 6373
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A pair of lovin couple went to a hotel one night. After finishin their ''business'', suddenly the guy saw a photo in his gf's wallet. ''Is that ur ex my dear? tell me pls cuz I don't mind about ur past'' ''Really? Good! that was me before the surgery(:
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I get so tired of the same old BS...can't I get a little BS variety?
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05-06-2011 20:33 by shoesan
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This whole being a responsible adult thing sucks.
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05-06-2011 20:30 by ff1241
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I haven't seen a spider in the house in days.WHAT THE F*CK ARE THEY PLANNING?
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05-06-2011 20:01 by Bear
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I just got kicked out of a casino for misunderstanding the use of a crap table
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05-06-2011 19:43
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If a girl's profile pic is a cropped close-up of the face, she is a porker.
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05-06-2011 18:55
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told that my Grandfather would never throw anything away! Not even that hand grenade he was holding just before he died.
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05-06-2011 18:48
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Finally, a funeral the Westboro Baptist Church can protest and no one will care about it...
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05-06-2011 17:26
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✓ Adolf Hitler, ✓ Saddam Hussein, ✓ Osama Bin Laden, ☐ JUSTIN BIEBER
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05-06-2011 16:38
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what do you call a Chinese man with one leg ? Tye wun shu.
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If a girl says she's different from other girls 7 times out of 10 she's a transvestite...
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05-06-2011 16:21
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Now that Al-Qaida has officially declared that they will revenge Osama's death, can we see the goddamn pictures coz we already pissed them enough as it is. Might as well rub it in their faces..
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05-06-2011 15:34
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wonders why do some women think restrooms are the best place to take pictures. Look at me don't I look sexy by this big roll of toilet paper.
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05-06-2011 15:32
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Mother's day is a great time to let her know you're gay. P.S. She knows.
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05-06-2011 15:12
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or Sir Gnarles just got his invitation to the Royal Wedding today.... Damn snail mail...
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doesn't care what Richard Gere thinks, a gerbil should not be used as a sex toy.
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05-06-2011 14:43
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Now that Osama is dead we can focus on more important things like why has anyone made a new Ernest movie..
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05-06-2011 14:36 by Phil
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Do you remember Sit and Spin? No, not the toy... your early drinking days.
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05-06-2011 14:32 by JC
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pretty sure Osama was armed.... Pretty sure he had to freakin legs too.
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05-06-2011 14:20
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putting the fun back in funeral
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05-06-2011 14:20 by Boomernic
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