Funny Status Messages and Tweets

   Pretty words aren't always true & true words aren't always pretty.

   that happy feeling you get when you see your bus coming.

   The only people that don't make mistakes are those that aren't doing anything

   Just once I want to see a marathon winner cross the finish line and immediately fire up a cigarette.

   This girl in the street yelled to me "OMG!! Your so hot! I want you!!" Its true. You can ask Brad Pitt he was right behind me.

   What goes around comes around. That's what people say. So all the pain you caused me will come back to you someday.

   wonders if makers of Raisin Bran and Grape Nuts ever get "Post" traumatic stress...

   Our attitude toward life determines life's attitude towards us.

   If you can't get them off your mind...then maybe they're supposed to be there.

   you know its over when there's nothing left to say

   People who say "If I disappeared, no one would notice" are wrong. Anyone who actually saw you vanish would be pretty freaked out.

   try to say the letter `M` without your lips touching.

   there's always that one person who takes a few minutes to get the joke...

   "Silence is the best answer for all questions" "Smiling is the best reaction in all situations".

   Your opinion of me DOESNT define who I AM.

   I graduated with a 4.0 … Blood Alcohol level.

   People shouldn't be judged by who they date, what skin color they are, and etc..If they are happy together, then let them live their lives..

   Take the chance, live out your dreams, make life better than it seems.

   Love is like a rubber band. At first we keep on pulling and pulling. Then when someone let go, it hurts the person who holds on.

   There's 8 letters in I LOVE YOU but there's also 8 letters in BULLSH!T!