Funny Status Messages and Tweets

   Facebook Skype: now married people can cheat via Skype while watering their crops on FarmVille.

   Casey Anthony must be a slut, it took 12 people to get her off..

   What did 0 say to 8? "Hey, nice belt!

   if Casey Anthony didn't pay her taxes, she'd be in prison right now

   I wonder if that Casey Anthony chic is single?.... She's gotta be a Maniac in the bedroom!!.

   wants to start a women's magazine called "Period". And some months I'll send it out late just to freak out my subscribers.

   After being dumped, everyone should have the right to tie their ex up and interrogate them.

   I don't get why all my drug dealers are so unreliable?

   Before we work on artificial intelligence, Why don't we do somthing about natural stupidity?

   Dear girl with flip flops on and has six toes. I enjoy your confidence but let's get some boots on

   There should be a temporary ignore function on cell phones.

   Remembers the days when editing a photo involved for scissors and tape...

   Still Cant Believe Were More Than Halfway Through This Year o:

   Please, smart people, stop getting out of jury duty.

   I hope the penalty for providing false information to law enforcement officers includes sterilization.

   You may be an open book but I'm a bit more complicated than that. The inner machinations of my mind are an enigma

   Nothing changes a Facebook relationship status faster than a weekend full of tagged photos.

   Oh good, now we can SEE the years haven't been good to that person we haven't talked to since high school...thanks Mark!

   Tough times never last but tough people do

   That feeling you get when you know whats going to happen at the end of a scary movie but yet you still bite your nails through out the movie