Funny Status Messages and Tweets

   may the bridges I burn light my way...

   on a (̅_̅_̅(̲̲̲̲̲̅̅̅̅̅̅(̅_̅_̲̅м̲̅a̲̅я̲̅l̲̅b̲̅o̲̅r̲̅o̲̅̅ ̅_̅_̅()ڪے break !!

   Falling In Love With You Is The Second Best Thing I Have Done .. Finding You Is The First ♥ ..

   A true friend sees the first tear... catches the second... and stops the third

   When a girl stomach hurts it is always blamed on 1 of 2 "P" words by everyone... Period, Pregnant.. <--words do hurt :(

   Sluts should be called, HUMPTY DUMPTY. Coz first they get HUMPED, then they get DUMPED.

   I just saw a baby with a t-shirt that said, "I'm what happened in Vegas!”

   To people who say love is more important than money, have you ever tried paying your bills with a hug?

   Games will be played, lies will be told, hearts and promises will be broken, feelings will be hurt, tears will fall, people will change, trust will be betrayed, and rumors will spread. But through it all, life will always go on.

   i wonder when Sarah Palin is going to weigh in on this Stocky Markety Swoopsy Dowsy stuff.

   Dear boys, the whole 'speed-by-girls-in-my-noisy-truck-and-impress-them' doesn't really work...but, then again you probably didn't need to hear that from me did you?

   Not to sound like an old maid, but why do people think they need to be in a relationship to be happy? Those who can stand on their own two feet are the ones that I admire most. Be strong and independent. Have patience and love will come.

   Some guys make me want to roundhouse kick them in the nutz.

   The price of books is ridiculous! We should at least get the teacher's edition for that price, dang...a free puppy wouldn't hurt either.

   You're more shallow than a kiddie pool.

   Take a hint: you don't look cool peeling out of a parking lot. You aren't a professional drag racer and it's f'n annoying. Now go buy some new tires.

   The later it gets at night, the funnier everything is. When you're laughing at nothing...it's time to go to bed.

   I don't need damn a brain, I have google.

   Prvo me upoznaj pa mi onda sudi, a ne po tome što pričaju ljudi ! :)

   Ya know it's a bad day when you wreck yourself before you check yourself.