Funny Status Messages and Tweets
Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.
Page: 4098 of 6439

Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter

A wise man among the ignorant is like a beautiful girl in the company of blind men

Never hold your head high with pride or ego. Even the winner of a Gold Medal gets his medal only when he puts his head down.

Even if I had 1 wish.. I wouldnt wish for you 2 Love me, Cuz I dont want your Love to come from a wish.. But straight from your Heart ♥

Most relationships fail not because of the absence of Love; but because girls Love2Much & Boys Love 2Many.

Those Who Live Simply Sleep Peacefully

We are not Chemicals.. So We can think before Reacting.

If you cant be a highway then just be a trail.... If you cant be the sun be a star... It isn't by size that you win or you fail... Be the best of whatever you are.

Money is not Everything... There's also Visa and MasterCard.

The only time a girl should Kneel down for a guy, is the day she ties her son's shoe-laces.

Big Girls don't cry...(They eat)

If you are not Happy being Single, You will never be Happy in a relationship.

I will stop Loving you, when an Apple fruit grows on a mango tree, on the 30th Day of February ♥

I wonder who's forehead would win in a head-butting contest between Tyra & Rihanna?

Dear ex, can you please return my dignity I left at your place but you can keep my Nickelback Cd collection.
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01-05-2012 00:33
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you never see the chihuahua in the Taco Bell commercials anymore...makes me wonder what's in those 99 cent burritos
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01-04-2012 23:27 by Eddy
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I missed my ex today so I reloaded & shot again
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01-04-2012 22:58 by Eddy
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Dear old love: I used to fantasize about you dying so that I could be single again. I'm so glad I decided to leave you instead of waiting for you to die.
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01-04-2012 22:39 by Czovczov
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If you play a Nickleback song backwards you will hear Satanic messages, even worse, if you play it forward you'll hear Nickleback
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01-04-2012 21:33 by Banjaxed
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I just finished washing a load of paper plates if anyone's wondering about my bank account balance.
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01-04-2012 21:13 by fadolo
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