Funny Status Messages and Tweets

   Today everyone will update about who they chose for president, then tomorrow it will be back to what they chose for lunch.

   I went to the poles today.... well, they were stripper poles, but those girls got my vote.

   I don't like the Republican Party and I don't like the Democratic Party... I just like to PARTY

   I can make Romney Noodles Obama self!

   If you're going to the polls with someone today and one of you is voting for Obama, and the other is voting for Romney....should you even bother going?

   Loser cleans up the yard signs.....

   Just demolished another box of macaroni and cheese buy trying to "Push here to open".

   Rosanne is running.....who cares

   Hey. If Obama wins yet I didn't vote for him....do I still get the free phone?

   I voted for Pedro because i'm tired of all this stupid Romney and Obama supporting jokes... retarded...

   I don't exercise to be healthy. I exercise to look sexy af naked!

   Voted for Romney, Obama self(:

   I believe in our constitution and what America was founded on, and as an Outdoorsmen and gun owner.. Romney/Ryan have my support.

   I just got friend requested from a guy I know is dead... what do you wanna bet he voted today too...

   I voted for the guy with the least amount of cartlage in his left knee...

   Ive waited in line an entire hour to vote, Ended up voting for some guy named Master Chief.

   after today the rest of the world will get "FOUR MORE YEARS!" without having to hear about the US election.

   Why no, stranger, I CAN'T believe how early it gets dark now despite the fact this phenomena has occurred every single year of my existence.

   Regardless of the results of today's election, I think we can all agree Ann Coulter will say something really stupid about it.

   My fitness goal is just to get down to the weight that I lied about on my drivers license.