love Funny Status Messages

   I'd love to watch Samuel L Jackson and Morgan Freeman get into a heated argument while James Earl Jones tries to stop them.

   Stop checking my Status , Go and love your GF

   Bernie Sanders endorcing Hillary Clinton feels so much like when the girl you love starts dating the guy you hate most.

   If you can't love the one you want, love someone who looks like them and just squint a lot

   If you love Jesus more than your husband then start praying the next time you need a jar open.

   ..... LOVE comes Naturally ........ HATE .... is learned .....

   Would love to know what gross pizza joint the Ninja Turtles ordered from that they never questioned delivery to a sewer.

   I used to dream of that fairytale kind of love. Now I'll settle for someone who'll gain weight faster than me.

   Love to use the Ouija board to pester my dead girlfriends.

   Trump In 1776: Women love me because they'll be hung by a rope in the town square if they declare otherwise.

   When I was a kid I thought Independence Day & July 4th was about fireworks & having fun. T'wasn't until I answered the call and fought for her that it was really about Duty - Honor Love of Country but most of all the Love of Freedom...GOD BLESS AMERICA!

   Choose a job you love and you will never work a day in your life because that field isn't hiring.

   Love going on brewery tours. It's fun watching drunk people pretend to understand science.

   Hey England: Every Brexit You Take. I Will Always Love EU. Un Brexit my heart. With Or Without EU. Straight outta Currency. Britain on the Dock of Decay. Since UK Been Gone.

   Tell someone you love them today, because life is too short. But shout it to them in Russian, because life is also extremely terrifying and very confusing.

   "Scots love me and I love those haggis smelling weirdos who wear those little girlie skirts!" -Trump, eventually, during his Scotland trip.

   My wife always accuses me of having a favourite child. It's not true, I love Matthew and Not-Matthew equally.

   You have to figure that Shaquille O'Neal never signs greeting cards "Love, Shaq" because that band the B-52's came out with that song and pretty much ruined it for him.

   Love becomes weak if it is not strengthened by truth. Truth becomes hard if it is not softened by love.

   I love when I can see a grown adult be happier than a kid in a candy store and the candy is shaped like toys!!!