love Funny Status Messages

   From the moment I saw u, I wanted to be inside u, I love ur smell, the way ur tongue feels, the way you tighten and loosen mmm..NEW SHOES

   The gym was so crowded today I had to skip my workout. Fortunately the line at Dunkin Donuts was shorter than usual. I love New Year's resolutions...

   Facebook is like an ex girlfriend/boyfriend that your in love with; you might not like all the changes but you still go to it when your bored.

   Life is too short to wake up with regrets.So love the people who treat you right. Forget about those who don't. Believe everything happens for a reason. If you get a chance, take it, and if it changes your life, let it. Enjoy life: you only have one!

   Another year about to be in the past ~ a few ups & downs ~ some you remember ~ some you forget ~ New Year ahead ~ Dreams to Collect ~ I wish you all a New Year that is full of happy times, great memories, good health, contentment, and most of all LOVE ♥

   An hour and 11 minutes after midnight tonite is 1-1-11 @1:11AM. A memorable time to text and express love to your 1 & only :D

   May peace break into your home and thieves come to steal your debts,May the pockets of your jeans become a magnet for 100$$ bills!May love stick to your face like vasilene and may laughter assault your lips!May happyness slap you across your the face and

   Dear Women, if you have in you're possession sweats with the word 'JUICY' on them, PLEASE for the love of God, do not wear them if, when you do, the "I" is stretched so far that it appears to be a hyphen..Nothin' ( J you )--( C why ) about it...

   We've got to give a little love, have a little hope, make this world a little better.!

   Women fall in love by what they hear. Men fall in love by what they see. That's why most of the women put on make up and most of the men lie.

   Im sure that 24 year old playmate model is not at all interested in Hugh Hefner's money. In fact if he were just a typicaly average senior citizen quite certain she would be equally in love with him. Did I mention I speak fluent sarcasm?

   I just love gambling here in Vegas. Sure, I may lose $100,000 but the drinks are free so it evens out

   May you have the gladness of Christmas which is hope; The spirit of Christmas which is peace; The heart of Christmas which is love.

   My girlfriend complains that I don't tell her how much I love her. I don't want to upset her.

   Dear kids, there is no Santa. Those presents are from your parents love, Wikileaks

   What's love got to do with it.....all I said is I wanted to have sex ;)

   Forgiveness does not always lead to a healed relationship. Some people are not capable of love, and it might be wise to let them go along with your anger. Wish them well, and let them go their way.

   I love when people cut me off because they're in a rush, then I pull up next to them at the same red light.

   "Sexy" means I want you. "Pretty" means I like you. "Beautiful" means I love you. "Gorgeous" means all of the above

   loves how Christmas movies capture the holidays in a way everyone typically experiences. In two hours: greedy men become charitable; enemies settle their differences; women fall in love with the unattractive nerd; and an angel get its wings.