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Today I identify as someone on welfare, so I don't have to go to work right?
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04-26-2016 07:16 by
Yoda
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As Jesus said: "It's ok to sin as long as you don't forget to ask for forgiveness later." -people who invent Bible Verses
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04-26-2016 02:00
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If someone says "bathroom policy" one more time, I'm going to have to kick a chick in the nuts.
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04-25-2016 18:57
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Dear theist, Atheists don't care who you pray to. Just keep it to yourselves and out of schools and government. =)
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04-25-2016 14:12
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Dear Atheist,if God isn't real why does it bother you so much if I pray to him and always will.
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04-25-2016 13:54
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That 5 second rule regarding dropped food doesn't mean much when you have a 2 second dog.
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04-25-2016 13:32
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As your next President, I promise to remove all things Kardashian....
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04-25-2016 08:36
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Looks like Andrew Jackson's been tossed to the back of the bus.
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04-25-2016 07:47
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Have yet to find one person who has actually been entertained by Cedric , but I am white....
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04-24-2016 20:38
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They should put Prince on the $20 bill and call it $19.99... It's "The bill formerly known as a twenty."
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04-24-2016 15:18 by
eengrms
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Shouldn't they just put Harriet Tubman's face on EBT cards???
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04-24-2016 12:46 by
SEAN
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Yes, Fuckery Dept.? I'd like to file a claim.
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04-24-2016 11:42
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So let me get this straight...The new twenty dollar bill is going to feature Harriet Tubman using the men's room at a target?
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04-24-2016 10:40 by
John Y
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My kids were playing hide and seek and they took out their phones and took pictures and then tag them on facebook. Times sure has changed since I was a kid.
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04-24-2016 09:33 by
Mike
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There are people who actually send you Candy Crush invites on Sunday? Really? On the Lord's special day? The evil is strong in you.
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04-24-2016 08:04
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The American dream I’m chasing is where the entire pizza is just a spiral of stuffed crust...
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04-23-2016 22:37 by
eengrms
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I was wondering where I can contract this influenza virus so I can get away with stupid sheit.
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04-23-2016 21:37 by
Barney
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The new twenty dollar bill will feature a clever line drawing of Harriet Tubman using the men's room.
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04-23-2016 21:12 by
Doc Noland
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Sea gulls are like the Kardashian sisters; if they weren't so frickin' annoying they would actually seem quite beautiful.
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04-23-2016 12:07
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Have yet to find one person who has actually been entertained by Cedric
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04-23-2016 11:37
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