Funny Status Messages and Tweets

   Sierra, Echo, November, Delta. November, Uniform, Delta, Echo, Sierra

   Carrie Fisher was found unconscious by a relative,who tried to revive her with chest compressions. Unfortunately, the force wasn't strong enough.

   I wish I loved anything as much as Santa loves rich kids.

   If you can't handle me at my drunk,...join the crowd.

   Carrie Fisher said Trump would never be her president and damned if she wasn't right!

   Dear 2016, for the love of all that's holy... Please take Hillary too..

   Dear 2016, for the love of all that's holy... Please take JCGJ too..

   Why is it friggen up if you put in a twitter neam

   OK... I think it's time for 2016 to die before any more good people do....

   I gave Santa Chocolate Laxative chip cookies...

   Why in the hell is 2016 letting Kanye West live?

   OK 2016 there are still a few days left ... so I nominate Hillary and the Kardashians just to ballance things out ...

   They say 50% of #status updates are written while sitting on the #toilet That's why I don't buy used mobile #phones .

   Melania Trump just reported a suspicious small package in her bedroom.

   Men in white windowless van's have the worst candy.

   my beer never tells me it has a girlfriend.

   Can someone tell me when Santa is coming? He forgot some of the stuff I asked for

   I'm going to an all white New Year's Eve party and I have nothing to wear

   Carrie Fisher will forever stake claim on the title of Best Buns.

   let's ake a picture of Trump at his Inauguration...and then again 4 years later. Should be fun!