love Funny Status Messages

   Love...it takes hostages and shows zero remorse.

   To all the women I've dated. If we have a secret love child together that you never told me about, just have them get me a giftcard for Father's Day. Thanks!

   Doing the Jerk....its a dance...To be honest I could jerk it all day...And I dont ever see myself gettin tired doin it...And its a good workout too..I mean my arm is already gettin tired...And I only been jerking for a couple of mins now..I love dancing

   Love is much more interesting when you have a DIRTY mind.

   Ladies.. Let no past relationship ruin your love life. Remember: "Love will only fail when you fail to love!" Keep moving!

   ♥ LOVE always has it`s ``ERRORS`` sometimes we try 2 ``REFRESH`` then realyize it`s best 2 b ``SHUTDOWN`` but the hardest part is 2 ``RESTART`` your life and ``REFORMAT`` your HEART ♥

   Dear God, Lets make a trade. Ryan Dunn for Justin Bieber? Love, Everyone.

   a smile is a sign of joy, a hug is a sign of love, a laugh is a sign of happiness and a friend like me...well...that's a sign of good taste.

   ME: "I wanted to marry you but my family members refused: HER: "Who are they to deny our love?" ME: "My wife and 2 kids"

   Dance like the photo isn't being tagged, love like you've never been unfriended, and tweet like nobody is following....

   Live once. Regret nothing. Rewrite destiny.. nothing is written in stone. Nothing. Love your life the way you need to, not the way your told too.

   Love means sharing your thoughts, your fears, your dreams, your hopes, your pin codes and passwords.

   We tend to be in despair when the person we love leaves us, but the truth is it's not our loss, it's theirs. They left the one person in the world who would never give up on them.

   When two confused strangers come together they call it love, and when they fully know and understand each other, they call it breakup.

   Love is never wrong...Especially when that love is between two young carefree ladies who have wandering hands and a deep curiosity for experimentation...Yea that's some real love :)

   Two Lovers plan to sucide. Boy jumped first. Girl closed her eyes and return backsaying 'Love Is Blind.' Boy in air 0pen his parachute saying 'Love Never Dies to'.

   Gotta love Facebook... I haven't had this much fun writing on walls since I was 6.

   I love to stand in line at ATM machines, and when people put in their PIN, I yell "GOT IT" then run away!!!

   Love is like a rubberband. We keep pulling, someone lets go and the one who held on gets hurt

   Be careful when getting on Facebook! Side effects may include; mood swings, constant crying, finding love, tired fingers, loss of friends, divorce, it's complicated, loss of time, starving family, dirty home, and too much drama!!!