friday OR weekend Funny Status Messages

   Orange is the new Black, so....Have a great Orange Friday

   Take it easy this Black Friday, (try not to trample anyone to death) because it isn't supposed to look like a riot you idiots... Shop online like a real modern American!

   I'm astounded at how fast my "I survived Ebola" t-shirt got me to the front of the Black Friday lines this year..

   if you don't already hate people, black friday shoppers is a great way to start.

   Black Friday: The day you spend hundreds of dollars on possessions to celebrate the birth of a man who didn't believe in possessions.

   This Taco Bell breakfast taste like I don't get paid till Friday.

   I don't know why they need a whole month, they get the busiest Friday of the year

   Celebrating "Thank-The-Lord-That-Stupid-Brown-Thursday-Black-Friday-Cyber-Monday-Marketing-Crap-Is-Over" Tuesday.

   I just read an article that Black Friday in Ferguson was a smash hit....

   on this very day 125 years ago it was also a Friday TGIF

   I think it's logical to hate the player, without players there would be no game and I would have a date for Friday night

   Not to brag, but I still owe Blockbuster $2.00 for not rewinding Weekend at Bernies.

   50 Shades of Grey beat Sponge Bob at the weekend box office. Sponge Bob could have stayed at number 1 but he refused to remove his square-pants

   50 Shades of Laze - My weekend plans

   The best part about being at work on Friday is that it gives me 9 hours to figure out what I'm going to drink tonight.

   JUDAS: "Still on for friday?" JESUS: "Friday?" JUDAS: "Yeah, you know, the Last Supper" JESUS: "The what?!?" JUDAS: "the Supper, just the Normal Everyday Supper"

   Just what is DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME and Why are we saving so much of it? Why can't the time change kick in on a Friday at 4pm?

   This weekend seemed to go a little faster than most. :/

   Friday the 13th might be an unlucky day, but when you live in the land of bacon, badasses and bald eagles, every day is a lucky day....... ‪#‎America‬

   If you watch Friday the 13th backwards, Jason's machete is a magic wand that brings kids back to life and sends them to summer camp...