JEBI Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon The irony of all this is, the internet was created to save us time...
←Rate | 12-03-2013 08:29 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon It should really be called 'teethpaste'
←Rate | 05-31-2013 12:33 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'd kill for a microwave that plays Europe's “The Final Countdown” during the last 30 seconds.
←Rate | 02-04-2013 14:52 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon MTV has named Miley Cyrus the best artist of 2013. Kinda fitting I guess, since MTV has no idea what music is anymore...
←Rate | 12-11-2013 14:56 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon I haven't been able to stop crying since that stranger on the internet said that they didn't like me...
←Rate | 04-08-2013 08:19 by JEBI Comments (1)  


   messageicon I don't know what's longer: a microwave minute or a treadmill minute...
←Rate | 05-01-2013 15:40 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon After sex, I like to cuddle up to her, wrap my arm around her, brush her hair and whisper: "Welcome to rock bottom."
←Rate | 02-28-2013 09:45 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon I've reached an age in my life where "you shouldn't say that.." turns into "what the hell, let's see what happens..."
←Rate | 11-21-2012 13:39 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon Scratching off a lotto ticket before you leave the store is a good way of letting people know that your life isn't going according to plan....
←Rate | 04-25-2013 12:08 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon I go from "Hard to get" to "Hard to get rid of" in 6 beers flat...
←Rate | 03-08-2013 14:36 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon I just changed my relationship status from "left hand" to "right hand"...
←Rate | 04-18-2013 09:10 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon I want to know what horrific ideas were rejected before they decided "Vagisil" was the best possible brand name?
←Rate | 05-12-2014 15:19 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon Friends don't let friends make 'Harlem Shake' videos...
←Rate | 02-20-2013 13:40 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon John Denver's “Rocky Mountain High” the new official song for the state of Colorado...
←Rate | 11-08-2012 14:49 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'd make more Broncos jokes, but I don't want to beat a dead horse...
←Rate | 02-03-2014 09:26 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon I've single handedly defeated my erection...
←Rate | 11-10-2012 14:03 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon Found out today that midgets dont like being called midgets....AND they really dont like being called people McNuggets...
←Rate | 12-14-2012 11:23 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon There... crazy glued quarters to the ground in front of the vending machine at work...let the fun begin....
←Rate | 11-29-2012 10:28 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you were born after 1990, you will never know the frustration of having to rewind your parents porn tapes to the exact same spot...
←Rate | 01-15-2014 08:31 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon My friend said to me, "you should start drinking Ensure" and I said, "if I'm going replace a meal with a beverage its going to be beer..."
←Rate | 05-31-2013 12:33 by JEBI Comments (0)  




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