life Funny Status Messages

   I wonder if anyone else feels like their life is a series of bloopers and outtakes.

   One of life's purest joys is discovering that something has pockets.

   ahhh! The life of an overworked Zombie

   Life Aint Always What It Seems To Be .. you Have Ur Ups N Downs Either Happily Or Sad But At The End Of The Day you Gotta Jus Forget Bout All That N Hope you Wake Up To Live The Next Day

   What do you do if an elephant comes through your window? ........Swim for your life !!!.......jlm

   If life were more like a movie, we'd all be dead after about 90 minutes.

   So I saw an old women on a little pink bicycle a few min. ago.....i think she has proven her eligibility for the thug life.

   Some people live life in the fast lane. You're in oncoming traffic.

   I'm not quite ready to declare this the 2,847th best day of my life, but it's certainly trending that way.

   Some people live life in the fast lane. I have decided that I live it in oncoming traffic at night with no lights on. Welcome to my world, buckle up.

   Right now my life is like a video game I'm stuck on this level without ne cheat codes

   When you tell a kid "maybe" all they here is "I swear on my life this will DEF happen!"

   3 little sentences that will get you through life...1 "Cover me" 2 "Good idea,boss" 3 "It was like that when I got here".

   Ahhhh...pity. Where would my love life have been without it?

   I'm sure glad life gave me other photo opportunities after my high school yearbook portrait.

   I feel like life isn't passing me by, it's trying to run me over.

   Sorry little boy who came to my door trying to make a better life for yourself, but I will not buy that 7$ candy bar from you when I can get the same candy bar for a buck at the store.

   beginning to feel like every day of my life is like an open tryout for a wacky new reality television show.

   I lost my phone for an hour. The day I lost my 5 year-old neice at the zoo is now the second most terrifying experience of my life.

   Dave needs to get more sheep in Farmville! ... Dave needs to get 6 more points to advance in Mafia Wars! ... Dave needs to get a f-kin life!