Funny Status Messages

   Watching the Cowboys. The John Wayne ones, not the loosing ones.

   in TIME OUT because riding the dog like it's a Small Horse is frowned upon in this establishment...

   Hang on Tim, God is caught in traffic. Still hasn't arrived in Foxboro yet.

   Iron Man is a super hero. Iron Woman is a command.

   If you're not happy being single, you'll never be happy in a relationship... Get ya life in order before you try to share it with someone else.

   Sorry Tim. The Lord giveth and the Lord taketh away.

   Sorry Tim. The Lord giveth and the Lord taketh away

   I don't consider myself a Tebow hater...that label is placed on we Tebow realists by his sycophantic minions. Just now...he threw a dead on pass...at the receiver's ankles.

   Too many hood guys not enough good guys..

   Not even FEMA could help the saints

   You don't have to like me, I'm not a Facebook status

   There may be plenty of fish in the sea, but to catch them, you must first become a Master Baiter. :))

   "It is better to have been on penici!!in, than to have never loved at all."

   "Ooh, the game was tonight?"- God

   The last time a Christian was that thoroughly torn apart, Caligula was Emporer.

   When I was in the 10th grade I was taught $ex-ed by a 65-year-old nun, which is kind of like taking barbecue lessons from a vegetarian.

   Marriage is like a deck of cards: In the beginning all you need are two hearts and a diamond. By the end, you wish you had a club and a spade.

   Gotta check my undies; I just made a Joyful Noise.

   thank you Tom Brady for showing the world that you have way more GOD given talent than Tebow!

   I would pay good money to see the mayhem guy from Allstate hook up with Flo from Progressive.