love Funny Status Messages

   First time I married 4 love. I've learned my lesson. Next time it's all about sex and money, but mostly sex.

   Why drown in love, when you can swim in lust ?

   Things that make women emotional- 1) sad movies 2) love stories 3) anything 4) everything

   I love running my fingers through my girlfriend's hair. It's also a great way to let her know we're out of napkins.

   I was going to post a story about how I used to love drinking gallons and gallons of iced tea in the 80's. Then I realized, no one wants to hear me complain about the freezing temperatures outside..

   I love you weirdos. I don't care if you're not accepted by the outside world or your own families.

   I wish I loved anything as much as New Yorkers love to tell you they're from New York.

   If you're looking for an ambitious girlfriend, I'd like you to know that I love being on top.

   I love that part of a healthy relationship where you realize what a psychopath your ex was.

   I love my new wood heater. Women actually want to take their clothes off for a change

   It would seem there's a weird pleasure in loving someone who doesn't love you.

   I love you and you ignore me, I ignore you and you love me.

   I would love to send so many people on One-way trip to Mars.

   I'm not h0m0ph0bic, I love my house!

   Can you fall in love through a rifle scope?

   Some people hope their search for happiness ends in love and fulfillment, I just hope mine ends in minimal bloodshed and no felony charges.

   Oh, I would love to stay for your yoga class....but, I think I would rather floss with barbwire or give myself a tattoo.

   I don't understand how girls could be so in love with a guy one week and the next not even talk to him for no apparent reason

   I will fake love and take full advantage of you .

   Whenever I see a happy couple, smiling, giggling, feeding each other food, whispering sweet nothings, very much in love, I just wish I could give them a lie-detector test.