friday OR weekend Funny Status Messages

   I stayed at a really nice, really fancy hotel this weekend. The towels were so thick I could hardly get my suitcase shut.

   Happy Kissing Friday Today..and tomorrow...Happy Coldsore Saturday....:)

   Just clubbed a Chik-Fil-A Cow with my Louisville Slugger and is now planning a rip roarin' BBQ this weekend and you're all invited...you're welcome.

   I hope we have a good weekend before the end of the world !!

   Daylight Saving Time this weekend but try not to lose any sleep over it

   I tell people to have a great weekend at noon on Mondays hoping they won't talk to me for the rest of the week.

   Not to worry Obama will fix everything while he's on vacation in Rio this weekend......

   Consider the social cohesion and dignity of the Japanese people in the face of unimaginable catastrophe. Contrast that with the behavior of Americans when faced with Black Friday.

   I still haven't set my clock forward and refuse to acknowledge the time change. I'm not losing an hour of my weekend

   Nothing in the world is more expensive than a women who's free for the weekend

   a stranger in a strange land. And that land is Denny's at 3am on a weekend.

   This weekend is either way too short, or I don't have enough Long in my Island Iced Tea...

   This Weekend Me And Some Friends Doing A Reenactment Of The Movie "Hang Over"

   Dear Liver, I'm sorry I abused you this weekend. My drinking habits have caused you pain a damage once again. I will make it up to you by not drinking for at least a week or until someone offers me a drink. Please don't be mad at me and continue to functi

   So let me get this right, the government is going to shut down Friday at midnight, and our soldiers will not get paid. The idiots in congress will still get their money? Where is the sense in that?

   Hey Honey... Remember that trip to Yellowstone we have planned this weekend?....

   DEVELOPING NEWS: The U.S. Government is shutting down....IN OTHER MORE IMPORTANT DEVELOPING NEWS: I've already started DRINKING!!!! The Government can tax me, but they can't ruin my FRIDAY!!!

   Just found out a human kidney is worth up to 100,000 dollars. On an unrelated side note, party with free alcohol at my house this weekend.

   Spring makes every day feel like you're stuck in the office on a Friday afternoon.

   : Forecast for the weekend - On Friday, mild alcoholism with a 70% chance of poor decisions and impaired judgement close to midnight on Saturday. Increasing chance of regret and hangover for Sunday.