Funny Status Messages and Tweets

   Don't worry guys, I have a plan. We can extinguish the Ferguson flames with the tears of all the Cosby victims.

   Riots will restart when they all figure out the liquor store they rioted last night is closed.

   Thought I was watching a commercial for Grand Theft Auto 5... Turns out I was watching CNN's reporting on Ferguson riots...

   In other news millions of facebook user suddenly got their law degree

   I can understand the right to protest. What I don't understand is why everyone had Christmas Lists in their hands. Oh yeah..... Looting Monday.....

   Why were police firing tear gas at rioters in Ferguson when they could have been firing job applications at them?

   I went to Ferguson, MO and all I looted was this lousy T-shirt...

   Why wait for Black Friday, when you can shop brown Monday right

   Remember Tiger woods was going thru it? - Bill cosby

   "I understand your logic, but let's try to look at this more emotionally." - men

   The only women who have brains are the ones who have not had them banged out of her yet.

   Kids: Never tell a stranger where you live. Give them your neighbor's address and watch what happens.

   DAMN!! Obamaphones sure are getting one serious workout these last two nights in Ferguson!!

   If the Ferguson police used THC grenades instead of tear gas, you'd see a much different scene.

   Does anyone know when the Christmas Tree lighting ceremony is set for Ferguson this year?

   I am SO out of the loop. So are Ferguson people rioting because Bill Cosby raped 20 women?

   Well, it looks like Ebola has taken a break from mass hysteria to let us celebrate Thanksgiving.

   So...I'm only going to assume that's it probably not a good time to yell "if it's brown it's down" in public.

   I'm thankful that everyone has finally shut up about this Ebola hysteria to let us all celebrate Thanksgiving.

   Marriage is like wine. It gets better with age. Also it makes you say things you regret...