Funny Status Messages and Tweets
Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.
Page: 6168 of 6374
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thinking about eating right, exercising, and quitting all my bad habits. But then I would attract too much attention, and frankly, I like my privacy.
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01-28-2010 10:45 by CMIFYCS
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So far today I made only one mistake...I GOT OUT OF BED!!!
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01-28-2010 10:42 by CMIFYCS
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Free Snowmen outside.......some assembly required
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01-28-2010 09:39
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wonders....with the largest memory chip, if the iPad will be nicnamed the "MaxiPad."
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01-28-2010 09:38
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thought the iPad was for the iPod for Bostonians
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01-28-2010 09:37
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A child is like a mosquito: when it stops making a noise,you know it's up to something.
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I just committed the perfect crime. I stopped paying my shrink. He took me to court. I pleaded insanity.
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The fact that no one understands you doesn't mean you're an artist.
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01-28-2010 00:42
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"never pass up a bathroom, never waste a hard on and never, ever trust a fart." Jack Nicholson
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01-28-2010 00:11 by Big Mac
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Yo Mama is so fat! She uses an iPad as an iPhone.
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01-27-2010 22:37 by Vito
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busy filling water balloons with fire hoses.
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01-27-2010 21:51
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Midgets got 99 problems, but an inch ain't one.
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01-27-2010 21:35 by Russell K
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lost her virginity, but still has the box it came in.
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01-27-2010 21:27
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hhhmmmmm the state of the union is on the B.E.T. network? I never saw that when Bush was in office.
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01-27-2010 21:24
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Today Apple unveiled the new I-Pad. You know, for those days when your not feeling so fresh.
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01-27-2010 19:55
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wondering if they call loacal area networks in Australia the LAN Down Under!!!!!
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The iPad: protecting your data from embarrassing incidents.
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With my iPad in my lap, I feel so fresh. All over.
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Seriously? The iPad? I'll just wait till they come out with a sleeker version... the iTampon.
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01-27-2010 18:26
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One day, you come home and everything has changed, like the locks.