snow OR flurries OR winter Funny Status Messages

   My favorite part of winter is when it’s over.

   Drivers ignoring winter conditions, may be subject to natural selection.

   In honor of the winter solstice I will also be cold, distant and filled with darkness.

   You survived the winter of death. Let’s see how you do in the summer of starvation.

   Summer, Spring, Winter and Welp

   This is the first good sized snow fall of the season and honestly the weather on TV is acting like the terrorism threat levels just moved up a two.

   Its still winter because Mother Nature saw all our summer bodies and decided we weren't ready yet.

   it safe to take off my Winter Solstice Glasses yet?

   I know winter has started when my neighbor returns my rake, and borrows my snow shovel .

   I must be getting old. Since when does 2 to 4 inches of snow become a winter storm warning? Back when I was a kid, we just called flurries, and we complained it wasn't enough to even have a good snowball fight, let along close schools.

   Oh, the weather outside can bite me. My car won't start to spite me. I can't feel my freakin' toes. Winter blows, Winter blows, Winter blows.

   I know the birds that flew south for winter mad as hell right now.

   My husband keeps insisting we try 69, but I think we should keep the thermostat at 72 degrees this winter.

   So irritating that my kid gets a text to tell him school is closed for snow day. He should have to stare at the news channel crawl for 45 minutes like I did

   Pro tip: Do not make snow angels in a dog park.

   You said you love spending time with your children. School Snow Days determined that was a lie.

   Winter: It's like the crazy murderer in a horror movie. Just when you think it's dead, it strikes one last time.

   First big snow fall of the season and the TV news is acting like the terrorism threat levels just moved up a spot or two.

   Winter storm named Grayson sounds like it should be wearing a tweed jacket

   "I had to walk to school 40 miles in the snow... barefoot" was good in it's day. But imagine the sheer terror on your kid's face when you drop "When I was born there was no internet".