snow OR flurries OR winter Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon My biggest fear is getting a murder hornet stuck in my facemask as I shovel snow Saturday morning in May.
←Rate | 05-09-2020 06:00 by Ron Comments (0)  


   messageicon Eskimos have over thirty words for ‘snow.’ That’s nothing, my wife has over 100 words for ‘F - off I’ve got a headache.’
←Rate | 04-19-2020 11:14 Comments (0)  


   messageicon The supermarket's completely out of bread and milk. What is it going to snow?
←Rate | 03-16-2020 17:02 Comments (0)  


   messageicon BREAKING: Snow White is down to 6 Dwarves.. Sneezy was just placed in quarantine.
←Rate | 03-09-2020 15:01 Comments (0)  


   messageicon It's snowing! And I think I'll go outside now for 30 seconds to take a selfie so all my Facebook friends can see how much I love the snow.
←Rate | 02-20-2020 08:01 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Any man that believes women are "the weaker sex," has never tried to reclaim his half of the blankets on a cold winter's night...
←Rate | 01-22-2020 08:15 Comments (0)  


   messageicon 1719: We can only pray the harvest will provide enough food to last the winter. Now: They had a sale on the 15 pound tubs of peanut butter at Costco, so I got 4.
←Rate | 01-12-2020 12:10 Comments (0)  


   messageicon My husband keeps insisting we try 69, but I think we should keep the thermostat at 72 degrees this winter.
←Rate | 01-02-2020 10:44 Comments (0)  


   messageicon My No 1 Resolution for 2020.. Only eat white snow.
←Rate | 12-31-2019 11:39 Comments (0)  


   messageicon every summer people try to work on their "summer body" ...i've been working on my winter body for years
←Rate | 11-22-2019 19:43 by Eddy Comments (0)  


   messageicon Sorry if I end up in your dms this snow ❄🏂 got me sliding everywhere 🤭
←Rate | 11-13-2019 13:18 by Krystal Comments (0)  


   messageicon Drank enough whiskey to talk the husband into a Titanic reenactment. He's laying in the snow and I won't share the picnic table with him.
←Rate | 09-25-2019 15:53 Comments (0)  


   messageicon people worry about their "summer body" but I've been working on my "winter weight" for years
←Rate | 09-04-2019 07:31 by Eddy Comments (0)  


   messageicon people talk about working on their "summer body" but I've been working on my winter body for years
←Rate | 08-27-2019 21:22 by Eddy Comments (0)  


   messageicon Finally, my winter fat is gone, now all I have are spring rolls
←Rate | 04-17-2019 07:22 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Just got done knockin boots! Alright fine, I just used a broom to brush the snow off of my sandals...
←Rate | 02-17-2019 17:22 by JohnY Comments (3)  


   messageicon it true atheist children lie down and make snow corpses
←Rate | 02-12-2019 13:32 by Zinc Comments (0)  


   messageicon Some of you ladies have more inches of snow outside than your man has in his pants.
←Rate | 02-11-2019 10:54 by RyanRyan Comments (0)  


   messageicon Coldest winter weather in recorded history. In two short years the President has fixed global warming.
←Rate | 02-01-2019 07:52 Comments (1)  


   messageicon am I watching The Weather Channel or Game of Thrones? it looks like winter is coming
←Rate | 01-28-2019 08:04 by Eddy Comments (0)  



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