Funny Status Messages and Tweets

   Heading to the polls to vote for the fifth time this week!!!!...... God I love living in the state of Florida!!!!

   When I was born, the day I was brought home form the hospital my parents put up a sign on my bedroom door: "Checkout Time 18 Years"

   Wear a smile. One size fits all

   It's finally here in a few hours America will finally find out the winner.............. between the pistons and the nuggets.

   When I voted I wrote Abraham Lincoln in for president and Bill Clinton in for Vice President , Because 2 things this country has Too much of is vampires and ho'z !!

   If you are undecided, vote for the one you would most likely buy a used car from.

   If you're undecided...vote for the one that held the most babies...

   My American friend says he's going to vote for the one who is willing to making the Pringles tubes biggers....as soon as he gets his hand out of one.

   I just made Romney noodles Obama self : - /

   I was gonna vote. But the I got high.

   I wonder if the BOSS played "Born in the USA" yesterday just to get under Donald Trumps skin.

   Voted. Now, I watch and wait to see which loser wins.

   Just spent 4 hours directing republicans to the correct voting location. Too easy lol

   VOTE FOR PEDRO

   It's just like American Idol... Vote early and vote often!!!

   Go vote so I can hit your like button. I know you want me to hit your like button.

   exercising their right to vote is as close as most Americans get to exercising

   Andy Reid said if Obama loses he can start next week against Dallas...

   Afroman was going to vote. But then he got high..

   Stop the world, I want to get off!