migasjoe Funny Status Messages

   Police reports state that Aaron Hernandez is claiming Bill Belichick instructed him to destroy the surveillance tapes

   Facebook status from God: Sorry rest of World...junior and I can't help you right now...we are busy helping some loon cross the Grand Canyon on a piece of floss

   Allen Iverson has retired more times than he practiced

   I threw a shotgun shell at my daughter's date. ..then I told him it's much faster after 11pm

   Feeling like a movie tonight....I think I'll watch Fast and Furious 6 and then maybe half of 7

   So Pete saw his shadow today...that means 6 more feet of winter right???

   I'm not saying this games over but children in Africa are wearing their Championship Broncos Tshirts

   Very disappointed that Nikolai Volkov wasn't selected to light the Olympic flame

   I can't stand the fact that people are so obsessed with this movie Frozen! They need to "Let it go...let it gooooo.

   RIP DJ E-Z Rock...May your eternal journey home be filled with more Joy than Pain

   If LaBron is really serious about winning he would sign with the Harlem Globetrotters

   SHARKNADO 2 took 18 days to film....credit to everyone... it totally looks like a 24 day shoot to me!!!

   There have been more sharknadoes under President Obama than any other President...

   Josh Shaw now claiming he broke his ankles keeping looters out of his grandmother's Bakery in Ferguson...

   well Notre Dame fans...In about a year FSU will have to vacate this victory so you have that to look forward to

   May the pillow be cooler on the other side ...RIP Stuart Scott

   Pete Carroll Press Conference "I'm just here so I don't get fined"

   Finger Prints on Super Bowl Trophy to be used in dozens of criminal investigations

   Harrison Fords plane crashed??? I want from each and every one of you is a hard-target search of every gas station, residence, warehouse, farmhouse, henhouse, outhouse and doghouse in that area

   BREAKING NEWS: Handsome rich man from New England forced to take 4 week vacation with Super Model Wife...Nations Weep...