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Snotty Funny Status Messages
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Page: 9 of 22
Somehow,, We've got to find a way to STOP the driver of that bus that everyone keeps getting thrown under.
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02-19-2013 07:40 by
snotty
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Any amusement you may have experienced from my past posts are in no way a guarantee of future performance.... Please initial here and sign here.
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04-08-2013 08:54 by
snotty
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Glad to hear we've all been picked up for another season.
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12-22-2012 07:32 by
snotty
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How did they measure hail before golf balls were invented?
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11-08-2012 18:28 by
snotty
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I am.... 'My 1st car had an ashtray'... years old.
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08-23-2013 08:03 by
snotty
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Nice try fat families with stick figure people on the back of their van
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06-11-2013 20:24 by
snotty
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We should hang out and stare at our phones.
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04-20-2012 17:06 by
snotty
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I Saw a Vespa crash into a Toyota Prius today...... There was glitter everywhere.
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04-28-2012 19:25 by
snotty
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According to my current parking spot I'm a physician
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05-18-2013 18:58 by
snotty
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If Sesame Street really cared about children,,, they'd realize Big Bird could feed a hungry family for a month.
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10-16-2013 18:33 by
snotty
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I'm just saying it might be a good idea for Liam Neeson's to take his family members to the vets and get them microchipped.
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01-16-2015 08:34 by
snotty
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I don't have a pet,, so I adopted this spider, but the stupid thing won't even chase the laser pen,,, It's got 8 eyes so I *know* he sees it.
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04-01-2012 17:39 by
snotty
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Lord Almighty, Adele...REALLY ?,, Just burn his house down & get on with your life already.
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04-02-2012 07:49 by
snotty
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Due to the holiday my status will be closed... I Will reopen tomorrow at 8am. Sorry for any inconvenience this may have caused.. Enjoy your day people!!
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09-05-2011 06:38 by
snotty
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I could really use one of those Chris Farley,, 'down by the river',, speeches right about now...
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06-04-2012 20:49 by
snotty
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Every meal I didn't have to cook myself,, is the best meal I've ever had.
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03-22-2012 20:35 by
snotty
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Next time someone gives you a business card, stick it in your mouth and eat it without breaking off eye contact
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09-15-2012 16:26 by
snotty
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If a tree falls in a forest and no one is around,,, Will the entire tree still be used to print a single CVS receipt?
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04-03-2014 19:00 by
snotty
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Top Gun was so unrealistic,,, Everyone knows Tom Cruise can't reach the clutch on a motorcycle.
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11-18-2013 07:56 by
snotty
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Apparently, you can only say "look at you! You got so big!" to children,,, old girlfriends tend to get offended.
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03-25-2013 08:36 by
snotty
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