BEGO Funny Status Messages

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   messageicon How embarrassing would it be if Facebook automatically updated statuses to what you where doing. “Billy is alone in his room.”
←Rate | 08-23-2012 23:05 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Overprotective parents raise the best liars.
←Rate | 05-31-2013 21:23 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Facebook is the adult way of having imaginary friends
←Rate | 03-09-2011 11:53 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon You don't have to like me. I'm not a facebook status.
←Rate | 03-17-2011 10:06 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Putting your phone away and paying attention to those talking to you? There's an damn App for that. It's called "respect".
←Rate | 04-25-2011 22:20 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon HOW can dogs sniff out bombs, save a guy from drowning, keep you from walking into traffic, but CANT figure out how to UNWRAP themselves from around a tree!
←Rate | 12-29-2011 19:01 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Why do people in movies keep all their lights off when they hear a noise? I’d be lighting that place up like friggin’ Times Square.
←Rate | 08-30-2013 23:07 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon You know you're lazy when you get excited about cancelled plans
←Rate | 10-01-2012 22:36 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon I don't know why beer companies bother with an expiration date... it's never going to make it anywhere near that.
←Rate | 06-13-2012 22:41 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon The best part of being single is that you always get to be right.
←Rate | 04-04-2012 21:24 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Study finds that a man looks into a woman's eyes for 8.2 seconds if he is attracted to her, 4.5 seconds if he is not, and 0.0 seconds if she's a C-cup or above
←Rate | 01-22-2012 21:57 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon I miss being able to slam my phone shut when I hang up on somebody. Violently pressing "end call" just doesn't do it for me.
←Rate | 09-20-2012 21:45 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon I have no idea how I use to get around in the dark before I had a cell phone.
←Rate | 01-18-2013 21:17 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Oh, you brought a laptop with you to Starbucks? You must be so very important.
←Rate | 08-29-2012 22:24 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon I hate mosquitoes!!! I mean, I know I'm delicious but damn...
←Rate | 10-03-2010 22:02 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon My brain is about as organized as the WalMart $5 DVD bin.
←Rate | 07-01-2012 22:17 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Hey, if you stay really quiet and listen very, very closely, You can hear the beautiful sound of you shutting the f$ck up.
←Rate | 05-14-2012 21:11 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Haters will broadcast your failure, but whisper your success.
←Rate | 02-23-2012 21:50 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon when you see a sign at a restaurant that says 'employees must wash BOTH hands', I think that's when you have to worry...
←Rate | 01-11-2012 22:23 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon We text 24/7, but when we meet, it's so awkward.
←Rate | 09-14-2012 21:26 by BEGO Comments (0)  



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