BEGO Funny Status Messages

   Guys: Wow, her status is dumb. but she's cute, so I'm going to like it.

   Sometimes, talking to a woman requires a translator.

   If you're single and looking to score, never bring girls to a bar... that's like bringing apples to an orchard.

   I don't play "Hard To Get" , I play "Never Going To Happen"

   I don't care what the world knows about me just so long as my parents never finds out

   Putting you're offline chat on Facebook so it actually looks like you have a life and don't sit on Facebook all day.

   Taco Bell sells tacos. Whataburger sells burgers. Chicken Express sells chicken. Panda Express are lying basta?ds!

   A moment of silence for all the brave coffee beans that gave their lives, so millions of people can get through another day.

   Be yourself" is the worst advice you can give to some people.

   Facebook is the best way to prove that you made the right decision when you broke up with that person you dated in high school.

   They should invent a snooze button that hits back.

   ''Are you free tomorrow?'' No, i'm expensive.

   Username or Password Incorrect” … You couldn't just tell me which one?

   When you turn 21, you can legally do all the things you've been doing since you were 16.

   I'm going to open a store next to FOREVER 21 and call it "FINALLY 22".....

   (Person:) Do you know how many calories are in that?! (Me:) Do you know how many f**ks I don't give?

   I wonder if Asian people put smileys like this ¦)

   Tired of being single? Go sleep on the couch for a night and remember what it feels like to be in a relationship. 

   Never ever give a woman a straight answer. Give them gay answers, they love gay answers.

   Jealousy is an illness, get well soon!