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now a days...all the little rascals would have been removed from their homes and the parents would be facing neglect charges
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05-02-2012 07:02
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Mark Zuckerberg is 28 today and is worth $100B. Reminds me of when I was 28 and was able to purchase groceries without selling plasma.
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05-14-2012 15:44
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Oh lord, give me patience and inner peace because if you give me strength, I might just punch somebody in the face.
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11-18-2011 00:58
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If you're going to be original, be prepared to be copied.
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11-18-2011 03:18
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Has that kid in the Dreamworks logo even caught a single fish yet?
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11-20-2011 09:41 by
SuthernFukr
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Congress just passed a bill that would allow people to carry a concealed weapon from one state to another....In other words, my trip out of town for Thanksgiving just got a lot more interesting.
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11-20-2011 17:27 by
totalpackage
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The haunting fragrance of her mysterious perfume lingered long after the blinding sting of her pepper spray had faded.
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11-28-2011 12:56 by
The Director
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Lindsay Lohan should at least have to spend as much time in jail as we have to spend hearing about it.
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11-30-2011 11:23 by
SEAN
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Facebook reminds me daily how moving out of my hometown was a great idea
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12-12-2011 22:21 by
BEGO
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so.... I'm writing a book about my sexual exploits....Okay....a booklet....FINE....a sticky note then....Whatever....
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12-18-2011 14:12
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video game logic: Everyone worse than me is a noob. Everyone better than me has no life
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12-20-2011 21:11 by
Mc Nutsack
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If you're going to stalk me at least notice when I'm running low on toilet paper & change the roll.
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01-29-2012 08:10 by
hihuggiehi
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I remember as a teenager I used to kill myself getting to a ringing telephone... Now I don't even have the ringer on.
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02-06-2012 19:12 by
BEGO
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They should just install an elevator on Mt. Everest and be done with it.
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02-12-2012 13:17
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I can already hear Monday morning whispering Go F***Yourself in my ear.
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02-12-2012 19:23
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When I text someone and they dont text me back, I automatically assume that they fainted from overexcitement.
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02-13-2012 09:24 by
flinnie
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Fact: You can burn up to 10 calories a minutes while having sex... Related: Looking for a workout partner.
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02-19-2012 13:36
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Sometimes I wish animals could talk....then I remember all the things my cats have seen me do when I'm alone and I'm very grateful they can't.
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02-20-2012 12:29 by
K-Mac
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The 21st century. When deleting history is more important than making it.
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06-04-2012 17:29
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When you open your heart to someone, there is blood...... LOTS and LOTS of blood... And then you die. So don't open your heart.
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06-12-2012 19:52 by
snotty
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