Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

   There's no I in team due in large part to my utter lack of athletic ability.

   In America, feng shui is just aiming all of your furniture at the TV.

   When I was a teenager, there was only one phone app. It was called the "dial tone."

   I wore some of those khaki shorts with tiny lobsters all over them and my credit score went up 30 points.

   I'm saving my abstinence for marriage.

   Finally told my parents their neighbor of 20 years has always been an openly gay man.

   Don't know if dogs get how cool they look in sunglasses.

   Often think if I'd taken a different path in life, I could be lying on a slightly more comfortable sofa right now.

   Wears an "I'm with stupid" shirt to marriage counseling.

   I rise to join your Pokemon cult!

   I refuse to join your Pokemon cult

   OMG Pikachu!!! My life is now complete.

   Please Note: That ad On Craigslist is a Scam!! I repeat, It's a Scam!!! The Pokemon Ho has nothing to do with that game everybody has been playing!!

   Be careful walking near tall building today. You may see millenials out on ledges for 1 of 2 reasons... they are playing Pokemon Go or they are depressed that their hero Bernie Sanders just fell in line with his comrades.

   As a Millenial I find my life is now full of much more meaning now that I have Pokemon Go!

   There are now a lot of confused and frustrated kids out there that are frantically trying to take selfies with their newly found Pokemon Go characters.

   The Socialist just endorsed the Corrupt Socialist for President.

   Sorry kids .... Bernie and Hillary are not really Pokemon Go characters

   Thanks, Amazon Prime. Just what I needed. Another consumer driven 'holiday.'

   Misconduct, Malfeasance and Dereliction of Duty: These are the Qualifications of Hillary Clinton for President. Is this really what you want in the Office of the President?