Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

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   messageicon My grandad has the heart of a lion and a lifetime ban from Edinburgh zoo.
←Rate | 02-05-2011 12:27 by lemonpillow Comments (0)  


   messageicon I went to the chemist and said, "I'd like some deodorant please." The woman said, "Is it the ball deodorant you want?" I said, "No, underarm."
←Rate | 02-05-2011 12:17 by @clarkysj Comments (0)  


   messageicon I've just had a tattoo done on my arse which says, "If you're reading this, we're in prison."
←Rate | 02-05-2011 12:15 by @clarkysj Comments (2)  


   messageicon I always thought visiting Egypt would be fun. Now I hear it's a RIOT!!
←Rate | 02-05-2011 12:08 by greg2missy Comments (0)  


   messageicon Black History Month reminded me that Peanut Butter was invented by a black guy...I Assume "Chunky" was in reference to his White Girlfriend...
←Rate | 02-05-2011 12:07 by greg2missy Comments (0)  


   messageicon The wife is playing Wii table tennis and screaming at the TV. The kids are hiding in their room. LMAO!
←Rate | 02-05-2011 11:41 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dear Protesting Egyptians: Please do not destroy the pyramids. We will not rebuild. Sincerely, the Jews
←Rate | 02-05-2011 11:09 Comments (0)  


   messageicon No I do not want to see who deleted you from facebook in 2010.. And if you keep it up, I'm going to be first on the list for 2011..
←Rate | 02-05-2011 11:02 by BOO Comments (0)  


   messageicon already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
←Rate | 02-05-2011 10:51 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Super Bowl Weekend!! Should I wear my shot glasses or beer goggles??
←Rate | 02-05-2011 10:22 by L Comments (0)  


   messageicon Okay........So on a scale from one to Courtney Love how drunk are you right now????
←Rate | 02-05-2011 09:28 by BMH Comments (0)  


   messageicon When those 3 phonecalls a day turn into a couple of text messages a week #DownHillRelationship
←Rate | 02-05-2011 09:19 by Seddy90 Comments (0)  


   messageicon #DontTextandDrive cause your "LOL" can turn into an "R.I.P"
←Rate | 02-05-2011 08:43 by Seddy90 Comments (0)  


   messageicon When karma comes back to punch you in the face, I wanna be there......just in case it needs help
←Rate | 02-05-2011 08:39 by A Charles Comments (0)  


   messageicon thinking green so I'm gonna save some electricity and unplug my refrigerator then leave its contents outside
←Rate | 02-05-2011 05:38 by toocold Comments (0)  


   messageicon wondering why so many people spend money they don't have to buy stuff they don't need to impress people they don't like !
←Rate | 02-05-2011 04:50 by Cole Comments (0)  


   messageicon ‎'Valentines day is soo over hyped...'-Every single person...:P
←Rate | 02-05-2011 03:54 by johnny Comments (0)  


   messageicon why only VALENTINES DAY for the 1 you love the most..why it can't be 24/7, 365 days a year !!
←Rate | 02-05-2011 01:51 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I am most like a mushroom. I am a fungi!
←Rate | 02-05-2011 01:50 by eaglet1122 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Can't we all just get abong?
←Rate | 02-05-2011 00:52 by Dopey420 Comments (0)  



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