Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

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   messageicon From now on, if we text longer than a week, we better fall in love. If not, you paying my phone bill for wasting my unlimited texts.
←Rate | 10-08-2015 12:18 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you ever see your girl smiling at her phone, she probably laughing at my posts and picturing our life together after she leaves you.
←Rate | 10-08-2015 12:20 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon When I say 'Netflix & Chill' sometimes I mean that. Stop kissin' my neck and watch this serial killer documentary with me or get the tf out.
←Rate | 10-08-2015 12:27 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon Sometimes you just gotta text your ex and remind them they ain't sh*t... Just in case they forgot.
←Rate | 10-08-2015 12:29 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon Most women don't even need to workout. Y'all burn enough calories jumping to conclusions.
←Rate | 10-08-2015 12:32 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon When girls are mad at you, there's a typo in every word 'cuz they texting so fast.
←Rate | 10-08-2015 12:39 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you don't grab your girls booty at least 46 times a day, you're living life all wrong.
←Rate | 10-08-2015 12:41 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon When I get a girl I'm gonna show her off. Guys who think being sweet to their girl is lame have that childish mindstate.
←Rate | 10-08-2015 12:48 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon If I liked a pic of you and your man, it doesn't mean I'm mature... It means holla at me if he acting up.
←Rate | 10-08-2015 12:52 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon My girlfriend just stormed out of an ice cream shop because they ran out of sprinkles, in case you’re wondering if I’m winning at life.
←Rate | 10-08-2015 13:22 Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you think you're somehow superior to anyone else because of your good looks you just might be an idiot.
←Rate | 10-08-2015 13:59 Comments (0)  


   messageicon In Isl-am women grow men’s babies and men obsession is, will they be given houries -gazelle-eyed (woman)- in the end?
←Rate | 10-08-2015 17:03 Comments (0)  


   messageicon “If you think you're somehow superior to anyone else because” you’re ugly but wealthy or you’re ugly but have higher social status “you just might be an idiot.”
←Rate | 10-08-2015 17:08 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Who said, you have to eat healthy to get in shape?
←Rate | 10-08-2015 17:29 Comments (0)  


   messageicon My baby is always one year old because I welcome people's we-ird question about his age with my middle finger.
←Rate | 10-08-2015 20:45 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Hi, you’ve reached my voicemail... Please leave your name, number and a damn good reason why this conversation couldn’t be done over text.
←Rate | 10-09-2015 13:16 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon Sorry I got drunk and angry and said all those things I meant but still shouldn’t have said.
←Rate | 10-09-2015 13:16 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon I made a huge TO DO list for this weekend. I just can’t figure out who’s going to do it.
←Rate | 10-09-2015 13:17 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you're dating someone, you really shouldn't give a sh*t what anyone who's not in your relationship thinks about it.
←Rate | 10-09-2015 13:26 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon Guys will never win an argument with their girl. You think you won and 3 hours later she comes back for round 2.
←Rate | 10-09-2015 13:27 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  



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