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Well-behaved people rarely make history. 
Deja moo: the feeling you've heard this bull$hit before.
All my Wargaming Buddies need to keep this in mind: The game is just ga without me..
Who needs soap operas, talk shows, reality tv, newspapers, and books when there is facebook
I gotta think Peyton Manning's neck injury has something to do with that giant forehead of his.
I'll never forget from my EX last words: "Are you sure I don't need a parachute?"
Pshhhh I did not fall… The floor looked at me funny so I used my mad ninja skills to attack
Does anyone have a good marinade recipe for Spotted Owl?
I am enjoying a threesome - Me, My Couch & My TV
Dude! He just called you a thief! Oh HELL NO, hold his wallet!
Life is full of fake people. Before you decide to judge them, make sure you're not one of them. ♥
Lost a lot of Xmas Manger characters, but 2 Wise Men and a He-Man will do.
Christmas is the time for giving family. So I'm giving away my family 'cause I'm efficient like that.
*Breathing hard* Today, I finally ran for 1 mile without stopping. STUPID ice cream man just kept driving even though I waved my money in the air...
Go to church....the wine is free.
Qwertyuiopasdfghjklzxcvbnm backwards is mnbvcxzlkjhgfdsapoiuytrewq ,,,, Now 14% of you will proof this for accuracy,,, and then die alone.....Asses
Single.. because my ex was such a loser..
You know it's time to do laundry when you dry off with a sneaker.
My doctor's waiting room needs some music. And better lighting. And more beautiful women. And a pole in the middle of the room. And booze.
Me? Stalk? Nah, I just observe... behind a tree... at night..in the rain 