Funny Status Messages

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   messageicon According to my Domino's Pizza Tracker,,, It's currently in my lower colon...
←Rate | 11-11-2012 21:41 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon 69 is the kamikaze of oral sex .. If I'm going down you're coming with me.
←Rate | 04-28-2013 21:24 by boomtastic Comments (0)  


   messageicon Just tried to change my password to 'Twilight,' but Facebook wouldn't let me. Said there's too many useless characters.
←Rate | 05-29-2013 17:29 by Zinc Comments (0)  


   messageicon Breaking News: Anthony Weiner is running for reerection!
←Rate | 07-25-2013 01:20 Comments (0)  


   messageicon They say, if you like her, put a ring on it. And I am saying, If you like him, put a BJ on it.
←Rate | 01-25-2013 07:06 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Sometimes a lil weed is all you need.
←Rate | 07-14-2011 13:06 by KISSTOPHER Comments (0)  


   messageicon Its funny how black NFL players sit during the national anthem in protest but would surely shoot another black for a cool pair of sneakers.
←Rate | 09-10-2016 11:33 Comments (0)  


   messageicon ■When you take an amazing picture you automatically think: “That will be my new profile picture”.
←Rate | 10-21-2011 20:29 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon James Cameron's new movie "Avatar" comes out next week. People say it will be as successful as "Titanic". Not the movie. The ship.
←Rate | 12-10-2009 01:58 by tomcall Comments (0)  


   messageicon considering taking out a loan and purchasing a yacht so I can decrease my deficit *Universal Health Care Bill logic*
←Rate | 12-22-2009 07:43 Comments (0)  


   messageicon might be addicted to eBay considering he just spent 6 hours trying to burn the face of Jesus into his toast.
←Rate | 03-08-2010 20:06 by The FRED Comments (0)  


   messageicon Its bad enough humour has dried up around these parts but now we have to resort to r acial humour? Really?
←Rate | 10-25-2012 13:11 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Let's get married, make babies, argue about money & yell hurtful things at each other while praying for a way out. That's real love baby!
←Rate | 11-03-2012 12:07 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Lord....Please send ALL the morons below me back to school!!
←Rate | 01-02-2013 17:34 by sully Comments (0)  


   messageicon Yeah, I know, some people are against drunk driving, and I call those people "the cops." But you know, sometimes, you've just got no choice; those kids gotta get to school!
←Rate | 10-25-2009 08:41 Comments (0)  


   messageicon it's funny Obama will negotiate with Iran, but won't negotiate with the his own government.
←Rate | 10-02-2013 00:19 by private Comments (0)  


   messageicon Obama has gone from 'Change you can believe in' to 'Can you believe there's no change
←Rate | 06-19-2013 07:42 Comments (0)  


   messageicon It’s funny how 1 text, 1 song, 1 mistake, 1 lie, 1 truth, and 1 person could change your mood in 1 second.
←Rate | 05-24-2013 21:36 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon congratulations danica patrick and jeff gordon... daytona 500's first all female front row...
←Rate | 02-19-2013 20:16 by bdog Comments (0)  


   messageicon People who say it cannot be done should not interrupt those who are doing it.
←Rate | 02-28-2013 18:02 Comments (0)  



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