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Joser Funny Status Messages
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Page: 16 of 41
Never let your sense of morals prevent you from doing what is right.
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06-09-2010 17:50 by
Joser
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Do it tomorrow. You've made enough mistakes for today.
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06-09-2010 17:50 by
joser
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Bad news: I burned my finger on the toaster. Good news: 1 down, 9 stupid incriminating fingerprints to go.
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06-09-2010 17:39 by
Joser
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it's not illegal it's frowned upon
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06-09-2010 17:38 by
Joser
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Less work. More aholic.
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06-09-2010 17:38 by
Joser
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I mix Corona with water and it gets me drunk... mixed Wine with water and it gets me drunk... I mix Tequila with water and gets me drunk again... therefore I've reached the conclusion that water is bad for me...
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06-08-2010 20:47 by
Joser
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Many personality flaws are now treatable mental illnesses... My insurance denied me coverage, apparently being an @sshole is a preexisting condition.
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06-08-2010 20:32 by
Joser
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Ok, TV coroners. We get it. You're comfortable around dead bodies. You can stop putting your sandwiches on them.
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06-08-2010 20:31 by
Joser
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I once went 4 days with out a cell phone. So ya, Third World Countries, I get it now.
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06-08-2010 20:31 by
Joser
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With all the disease in this world, I'm just happy I didn't catch "The Stupid", or any other airborne illness like Freckles
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06-08-2010 20:30 by
Joser
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What do I mean, "inner geek"? I'm deluding myself -- I'm pretty much geek all the way through.
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06-08-2010 19:23 by
Joser
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put the bom in the bom sha-bom bom, but lays no claim to the ram in the ramalama ding dong.
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06-08-2010 19:22 by
Joser
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thinks copy & paste is the greatest invention ever thinks copy & paste is the greatest invention ever thinks copy & paste is the greatest...
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06-08-2010 19:13 by
Joser
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sick and is therefore listening to The Cure.
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06-08-2010 19:01 by
Joser
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When asked "What would you bring with you to a deserted island", how come no one ever replies, "A boat."?
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06-08-2010 17:44 by
Joser
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With all the technology available now, you'd think they'd have found a way to grow apples without those little stickers.
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06-08-2010 17:42 by
Joser
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Sunburn is only a laughing matter when it happens to someone else.
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06-08-2010 17:39 by
Joser
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how many hijackings with nail clippers and shampoo have there been? None, that's how many!
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06-08-2010 17:38 by
Joser
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If the show is called America's Got Talent, how come Howie Mandel is hosting it?
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06-08-2010 17:38 by
Joser
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Biggest trade to date: Lakers to trade Jack Nicholson
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06-07-2010 21:45 by
Joser
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