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Page: 16 of 66
Nothing moves faster than a girl untagging herself from a picture that makes her look fat.
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09-04-2011 22:41 by
BEGO
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How to kill a Spider: Get a piece of tissue paper, approach it slowly, and very carefully, burn the house down.
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09-13-2012 21:46 by
BEGO
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I think my neighbor is stalking me as she's been googling my name on her computer. I saw it through my telescope last night.
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09-04-2011 23:04 by
BEGO
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A thief broke into my house last night searching for 'Money' .... So I woke up and started searching with him
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09-09-2012 22:11 by
BEGO
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To the guy who named cotton candy: Yes! It looks just like it sounds. To the guy who named Milk Duds: What the hell is wrong with you?
76
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06-10-2011 22:50 by
BEGO
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I would unfriend you but I enjoy laughing at your life.
76
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01-27-2013 21:10 by
BEGO
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We all have that one friend who needs to learn how to whisper
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12-12-2011 12:24 by
BEGO
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Visa is everywhere you want to be…except out of debt.
38
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07-05-2011 22:22 by
BEGO
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"Do you have a cell phone?" You might as well be asking me if I have a pulse.
38
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05-04-2011 22:27 by
BEGO
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Before I go to sleep, I start imagining stuff that I would like to happen.
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10-05-2011 21:22 by
BEGO
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I can't believe I work 40 hours a week to be this poor.
38
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05-21-2012 22:00 by
BEGO
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Their is nothing worse that realizing the vacation you planned is going to be the same week as her period.
38
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07-10-2012 21:56 by
BEGO
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If you watch the Harlem Shake backwards, it's a video about a guy who parties longer than everyone else.
38
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03-01-2013 21:26 by
BEGO
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My past is my past, it made me who I am, I have no regrets, wouldn't change a thing. I just don't live there anymore.
38
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09-13-2012 21:39 by
BEGO
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Life is weird. You can go from being strangers. To being friends. To being more than friends. To being pratically strangers again.
130
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05-03-2013 21:25 by
BEGO
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I found out today that you could group your friends on Facebook and name the group whatever you want, however I didn't know it would send the people notifications saying that I added them to the, "People I've f*****.." group, sorry..
65
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07-23-2011 21:40 by
BEGO
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You know you're awesome when Facebook suggests people you have already had sex with.
65
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05-01-2012 21:43 by
BEGO
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They say that the first sign of alcoholism is drinking alone. I have a dog, so I don't have to worry about that.
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05-30-2012 21:54 by
BEGO
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At least your tax dollars are helping the secret service get laid.
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04-15-2012 22:07 by
BEGO
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0
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If you're constantly posting “loving my life!” as your Facebook status, you're probably not.
65
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08-23-2012 23:05 by
BEGO
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