BEGO Funny Status Messages

   Men are like coolers. Load them up with beer and you can take them anywhere.

   It's the little things in life that count. Like my salary.

   When you poke someone on facebook, where exactly are you supposed to be poking them ?

   Have you noticed in movies they ask someone wearing a mask "who are you?"

   Marriage: finding that special someone you want to annoy the rest of your life

   People say best friends are hard to find. That's because the best one's already mine.

   Mistakes make you think. They make you realize that sometimes there are no next times, no time outs and no second chances.

   I love biting the ears and heads off chocolate Easter bunnies.

   Easter can be just as much fun as an adult as it was as a child. Just paint and hide beer cans instead of eggs.

   Did anyone else ever wonder why the Easter Bunny gave away chocolate eggs? Last I checked, bunnies don't lay eggs. What kind of sick new species is this?

   If Easter Egg hunting was an Olympic event, I would have at least 4 Gold Medals by now. I'm not sure why it is, but I have this extraordinary sixth sense.

   Santa, the Tooth Fairy, and the Easter Bunny, seemed to like the rich families more. Who liked the poor families more? the Stork.

   Being in LOVE is like Being DRUNK. No control over what you do.

   I laugh at your problems, everybody else does.

   By the time a man realizes that his father was right, he has a son who thinks he's wrong.

   I may be fat, but you're ugly – I can lose weight!

   Putting your phone away and paying attention to those talking to you? There's an damn App for that. It's called "respect".

   About 50% of the time “good luck” really means “efff you.”

   Well,today was a total waste of your makeup

   Did you guys know that turning up the radio fixes almost all your car problems?! Crazy.