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wanted to go for a nature walk in the woods with my ex today, but the shovel wont fit in my backpack :/ 
Some people come into our lives & leave footprints on our hearts. Others come into our lives & make us wanna leave footprints on their face.
Son, when I was your age, our video game were Big dots eating little dots while being chase by others dots who ran when my dot ate a special dot....
wonders Why is it ok for a Gay man to change in a Men's Locker Room but, it's Not ok for a Straight man to change in a Women's Locker Room?
Here's a question: You ever wonder how many REAL friends you had before the whole Facebook, Myspace, & Twitter thing came into existence?.......You're wondering now.
I've got a time machine. I get in and it takes me seven hours into the future. I call it......a bed.
I don't think I'll ever reach the age where I'm old enough to know better.
As a young child my mom told me I could be anybody I wanted to be. Turns out the police call it identity theft.
The problem with new year's resolutions is that people aim to high, start small like..."I'm not going to fart in church."
just watched 'Marley and Me'... Sad movie. I won't give it away but lets just say the sequel will just be called... 'Me'.
I am so happy to hear that curiousity killed the cat. For a while, I was the only suspect..
"Windows is waiting for the program to respond." Funny... So am I.
There are three kinds of people: The ones who learn by reading. The ones who learn by observation. And the rest of them who have to touch the fire to learn it's hot.
loves how my gf calls me on her breaks. Which involves hearing courtesy flushes. Learn to break somewhere else.Thanks.
Relax. If you didn't want me knocking it over, why the hell did you write "tip jar" on it? Just for that, I'm taking my 15 cents back...
May the 4th be with you!
Do you think there's any limit to how many blades they'll put on razors? Like in 2025 there will be the Schick Annihilator 100.
having an out of money experience
So I guess the movie 'Armageddon' shows that oil workers are better at destroying asteroids than stopping oil leaks
Be sure to take the time to honor a soldier today by punching a politician in the face. 