Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

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   messageicon Did you that a slug has 3,000 teeth and four noses. Beating out Michael Jackson and Joan Rivers by eight teeth.
←Rate | 11-12-2011 21:07 Comments (0)  


   messageicon R.I.P. Adam "MCA" Yauch...You finally got your License to ILL.
←Rate | 05-04-2012 13:51 Comments (0)  


   messageicon R.I.P To everyone who didn't make it to this Thanksgiving, I hope their families will be strong & have fun for them.
←Rate | 11-24-2011 15:49 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon my dads a math professor and he staples taco bell applications on failed tests
←Rate | 02-12-2012 22:34 Comments (0)  


   messageicon "I'm going to open a restaurant called" "Peace and Quiet" where" noisy people "meals cost $150."
←Rate | 06-24-2015 16:53 Comments (1)  


   messageicon lamophobia is the new Race Card.
←Rate | 12-19-2015 16:23 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Aaron Hernandez went from getting 40 million as a tight end, to needing two packs of smokes for a tight end.
←Rate | 04-16-2015 18:02 by John Y Comments (0)  


   messageicon (true story) The neighbor guy stop over to thank me. Every time I'm outside grilling and take my shirt off his wife jumps up and runs outside to "mow the lawn" I thought it was weird that she mowed it twice a week.
←Rate | 05-26-2015 20:24 Comments (0)  


   messageicon A country song,,, but for how bad country music is.
←Rate | 10-12-2013 14:38 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon Megyn Kelly said "Jesus and Santa Claus are white" well if they weren't they live in Detroit and East St. Louis!
←Rate | 12-14-2013 05:03 by Lil-David Comments (0)  


   messageicon Obama and Jerry Jones need to get together and figure out what they are doing wrong with America and America's Team.
←Rate | 12-16-2013 21:07 Comments (0)  


   messageicon The only government agency that listens to you is the NSA.
←Rate | 01-06-2014 19:29 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon I had my first gay experience today. I washed the dishes.
←Rate | 02-15-2014 13:18 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Its not my fault I have a double-chin...when God was giving out chins..I thought he said Gin so I said I'll have a double.
←Rate | 02-15-2014 13:31 by Baddie Comments (0)  


   messageicon Behind every successful woman is a man staring at her butt.
←Rate | 08-07-2014 15:23 Comments (1)  


   messageicon If you think your job stinks, think about the kid that cleans the bathroom at Taco Bell
←Rate | 08-31-2014 21:41 by MWC Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dear Santa, us big girls like toys too just put them in the second drawer of my nightstand!
←Rate | 12-19-2012 07:44 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Girl I would strap 45 lb plates to my ball sack and swim up the Amazon river with Rosie O'Donnell's queef as my air supply to prove my value to you.
←Rate | 01-18-2013 10:57 by @RonnieChapman Comments (0)  


   messageicon People say weed smokers are lazy. Well guess what as*holes, the blunt doesn't pass it self. And it sure isn't rolling it self.
←Rate | 04-19-2013 21:31 by BEGO Comments (1)  


   messageicon It's a good thing Whoopi Goldberg can use one of her dreads as a tampon if she ever runs out.
←Rate | 04-21-2013 01:00 Comments (0)  



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