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Me to husband: To be clear, when I say “let’s get it on”, I’m talking about the two-person horse costume we got for Halloween. 
I wish I could help run a country into the ground and still take a $100,000 trip for my birthday... btw, your welcomed Obama for your birthday trip.
I want to become a receptionist so I can say "Your son Rip is on line toot"
Yesterday a Radio DJ said that America was an Obama Nation, he was sort of right... its becoming an abomination!
I'm the one who screwed you all, but thanks for blaming the black guy.. George. Bush
"My imaginary friend is better than yours!" ~ religion.
at 11:08 pm. Troy Davis got what he had coming for the last 20 years. Jury said he did it. Court of Appeals said he did it. Federal Judge said he did it. Supreme Court Said he did it.
I'm going to tattoo "Religion" on my d!ck, and force it down peoples throat and see how THEY like it!
I'm not saying I'm fat but, my favorite machine at the gym is of the vending variety.
Husseincare is unconstitutional
I celebrated 9/11 by swiping towels from motels that were not American owned. Take THAT, Towel Heads.
Bill O'reilly, you are interviewing the President of the US, not Lindsay Lohan. Let the man finish a thought would you? douchebag.
MSNBC: quickly moving back to Bridgegate....CNN: quickly moving back to missing airplane.....Fox News: laughing their asses off......
poking you with a spork
says it's a dog eat dog world and I'm wearing milkbone underwear.
having a great time controlling your mind right now.
if its a long walk on a short beach, do we just pace back and forth..
i guess its better to be picking daisies than pushing them up
Just had to ask myself, "What would a competent person do in this situation?"
Give me patience, and GIVE IT TO ME NOW! 