Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

View All Funny Status Messages

Sort:  Recent   |  Oldest  |  Rating
Trump Filter: ON | OFF


Search Messages:
Page: 5011 of 5593

   messageicon They done studies you know, 60% of the time it works everytime.
←Rate | 04-09-2011 16:35 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Sorry hun, but unlike you, I'm not a doorknob where everyone gets a turn. I'm more of a casino where only the lucky ones hit the jackpot.
←Rate | 04-09-2011 15:40 by Hovo Comments (0)  


   messageicon If looks could kill, mirrors would be the leading cause of death among ugly people.
←Rate | 04-09-2011 15:40 by Hovo Comments (0)  


   messageicon The awkward moment when you realize your whole life has been a lie this whole time
←Rate | 04-09-2011 13:59 by Hovo Comments (0)  


   messageicon Can we go without somebody not whining or being dramatic in a post for at least a minute?! Nope, too late.
←Rate | 04-09-2011 13:46 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Since they eat brains, you have nothing to worry about if there is a Zombie Apacalypse.
←Rate | 04-09-2011 12:58 Comments (0)  


   messageicon To the woman at the supermarket with seven screaming kids. I slipped a large box of condoms in your trolley when your head was turned. Remember it's a Vagina NOT a Clown Car
←Rate | 04-09-2011 12:24 Comments (0)  


   messageicon going to miss Glenn Beck and his rants.. For example "Hemp Growing Marxist fornicators are conspiring with the liberal media to fill the Lincoln Memorial reflecting pool with bong water
←Rate | 04-09-2011 10:36 by Van Comments (0)  


   messageicon This world is not going to make any real progress until we stop perpetuating the belief that "paper" beats "rock."
←Rate | 04-09-2011 08:46 by flinnie Comments (0)  


   messageicon There's a new drinking game at my house. Every time the Democrats call Republicans "extremists" or "radicals" we have to do a shot!!!
←Rate | 04-09-2011 07:45 Comments (1)  


   messageicon Unless you come from a ethnicity with a tribal history. Having a tribal tottoo just helps others point out just how stupid that your are. Yes white college boy I'm talking to you.
←Rate | 04-09-2011 05:36 by ff1241 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Just a quick message to all the chics out there...Having over a thousand friends on facebook and 75% of them are men doesn't mean you are popular....it means your vagina is!!!
←Rate | 04-09-2011 04:38 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I said no to drugs, but they just wouldn't listen.
←Rate | 04-09-2011 02:58 Comments (0)  


   messageicon boycotting shampoo and demanding real poo!
←Rate | 04-09-2011 02:57 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Computers are VERY educational devices... they teach people how to @#%$ cuss!
←Rate | 04-09-2011 02:49 by Philly Bob Comments (0)  


   messageicon God created stupid people to keep us smart ones amused.
←Rate | 04-09-2011 02:18 by Philly Bob Comments (0)  


   messageicon Food Network is like Porn...you always wanna try out what they are doing!
←Rate | 04-09-2011 00:02 Comments (0)  


   messageicon it means no worries for the rest of your days. it's my problem-free philosophy. hakuna matata.
←Rate | 04-08-2011 23:42 by Dealbreaker Jones Comments (0)  


   messageicon Blanket on, too hot. Blanket off,too cold. One leg out, perfect,until the awkward moment when the demon from Paranormal Activity grabs it..
←Rate | 04-08-2011 22:21 by Seddy90 Comments (0)  


   messageicon When do you think Snooki gonna realize that she's a GRENADE?
←Rate | 04-08-2011 22:08 by Surge Yarmolyuk Comments (0)  



Submit your own funny facebook status message here:
Name:
Status Message:

... characters left