Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

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   messageicon [ ] single [ ] taken [x] dating imaginary person, that's perfect for me
←Rate | 05-01-2011 22:43 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Should I still call a DR if I have a have an erection for more then 4 hrs but I have not taken anything???
←Rate | 05-01-2011 21:14 by eaglet1122 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I've started dating Little Red Riding Hood's gran. She's an animal in bed.    
←Rate | 05-01-2011 21:00 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Proof that a level weirder than weirdness exists
←Rate | 05-01-2011 20:53 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Just call me angel of the morning angel, just touch my cheek before you leave me
←Rate | 05-01-2011 20:47 by Brent Comments (0)  


   messageicon I tried the "Hokey Pokey" put my left foot in; took my left foot out... Mofo still won't shut up. Ain't that what it's all about?
←Rate | 05-01-2011 20:33 Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you're talking behind my back, you're in a good position to kiss my a$$!!
←Rate | 05-01-2011 17:59 by CJ Comments (0)  


   messageicon Watching MTV Cribs makes me feel better about downloading music from the internet.
←Rate | 05-01-2011 17:44 by lemonpillow Comments (0)  


   messageicon My therapist says I have an obsession with revenge. We'll see about that..
←Rate | 05-01-2011 17:12 by Rosaline Comments (1)  


   messageicon I am a kind of paranoiac in reverse. I suspect people of plotting to make me happy.
←Rate | 05-01-2011 17:10 by Neli Comments (0)  


   messageicon I dont watch porn on purpose...Its alwayz an accident cuz those movie titles just be trickin me all the time..."The Fantastic Foursome"..."Miracle on 69th Street"..."Glad-he-ate-her"..."Womb Raider" and my personal fav "Riding Miss Daisy"
←Rate | 05-01-2011 16:36 by bryan j brown Comments (0)  


   messageicon The only time I've ever had a chip on my shoulder was when I tried to dump the entire bag into my mouth at once.
←Rate | 05-01-2011 14:13 by Seddy90 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I find my kitchen sink stays much cleaner by washing my dishes in the toilet. When did you say you wanted to come over for dinner?
←Rate | 05-01-2011 13:53 by Bill Legarzia Comments (0)  


   messageicon Soo busy today but I FINALLY got a chance to sit down for a minute..... too bad i'm still at work and the place I'm sitting is on the toilet :/
←Rate | 05-01-2011 13:52 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Fake: it's the latest trend, and everyone seems to be in style.
←Rate | 05-01-2011 13:51 by bijoux Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dear disgusting neighbor, having sex w/guys while your husband was deployed in Korea was just gross. Glad I told him what you did. Sincerely, someone who doesn't cheat
←Rate | 05-01-2011 13:36 by Trishwj Comments (0)  


   messageicon Ahh the Sunday after Easter... Catholics forgot where church was already, see you at Christmas!
←Rate | 05-01-2011 12:40 by Bob Comments (0)  


   messageicon the good Lord didn't create anything without a purpose, but mosquitoes come close.
←Rate | 05-01-2011 12:19 by Franklin Graham Comments (0)  


   messageicon don't let your worries get the best of you; remember, Moses started out as a basket case.
←Rate | 05-01-2011 12:16 by Franklin Graham Comments (0)  


   messageicon the story of the Good Samaritan was being told a Sunday school class. The teacher asked the class, 'If you saw a person lying on the roadside, wounded and bleeding, what would you do?' A thoughtful little girl broke the silence, 'I think I'd throw up!'
←Rate | 05-01-2011 12:15 by Franklin Graham Comments (0)  



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