Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

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   messageicon Whenever I need a moment to myself, I just go on MySpace.
←Rate | 05-14-2011 17:51 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Life doesn't change. Only the people in it.
←Rate | 05-14-2011 16:59 by @Buddz31 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Whenever I hear a woman say, "I dont need a man" ...all I hear is, "I cant get a man"
←Rate | 05-14-2011 16:36 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Friends are like underwear.... Some crawl up your butt... Some snap under pressure... Some don't have the strength to hold you up... Some get a little twisted... Some are your favorite.Some are cheap & just plain nasty.And some actually do cover your butt
←Rate | 05-14-2011 16:05 by shoesan Comments (0)  


   messageicon Are you supposed to get an email that says “HAHAHAHAHA” after signing up for Match.com?
←Rate | 05-14-2011 14:53 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dear Mario, I wested my childhood just to save your Girlfriend!
←Rate | 05-14-2011 14:44 by VisHaL Comments (0)  


   messageicon Treat em like ladies - love em like lesbians!
←Rate | 05-14-2011 14:20 by Raul Guzman Comments (0)  


   messageicon With the success of "Teen Mom" as well as "16 & Pregnant," MTV is proud to announce their new show "15 & F*cking."
←Rate | 05-14-2011 13:54 by Marshall the Great Comments (1)  


   messageicon Tom's may provide shoes for poor kids in Africa but I provide jobs for kids in China by purchasing Nikes. I'm truly the better person.
←Rate | 05-14-2011 13:52 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon NOT FAT! I'M FESTIVELY PLUMP
←Rate | 05-14-2011 13:52 by Raul Guzman Comments (0)  


   messageicon Why is it that when a bird flies into a window, everyone feels bad for the bird, but when I walk into a sliding glass door, it's suddenly f*cking hilarious?
←Rate | 05-14-2011 13:49 by Marshall the Great Comments (2)  


   messageicon Sarcasm - honesty's drunk uncle.
←Rate | 05-14-2011 13:47 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you're talking on your cell phone in a public bathroom, I will flush the toilet over and over so your friend knows *exactly* where you are.
←Rate | 05-14-2011 13:44 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon Props to the radio stations!! I know it must be difficult with the different lengths of songs yet you still manage to sync ur commercials with every other radio station!
←Rate | 05-14-2011 13:35 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon Next time I'm on an elevator with four or more strangers, I'm going to turn around and say, "I'm sure you're wondering why I've gathered you all here."
←Rate | 05-14-2011 13:33 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon Survival rule #1: You go first.
←Rate | 05-14-2011 13:32 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon 2011 Pick Up Lines: "I have a full tank of gas."
←Rate | 05-14-2011 13:30 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon switched to an electric car but then my electric bill went up......
←Rate | 05-14-2011 13:16 Comments (0)  


   messageicon just named the skidmarks in my underware"Maria"!.Its kinda like diahrea,but its dried up and the same old crap!
←Rate | 05-14-2011 12:18 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Height of tension:Obama updated his status on Facebook "Osama is dead."Justice has been done,after a few minutes Obama gets a notification "Osama has liked your status ".
←Rate | 05-14-2011 11:33 Comments (0)  



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