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Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump
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Don't take a good woman for granite.... trade something else for her...Granites expensive!!!!!!
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09-14-2011 12:42
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You look so beautiful I forgot how bad your personality was.
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09-14-2011 12:23 by
Lugo
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Kissing a girl on her forehead is care, on her cheek is respect, on her lips is love, but kissing her in front of her boyfriend is GUTS
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09-14-2011 12:08 by
SuthernFukr
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Can somebody please tell these politicians that say "government doesn't create jobs" that they work for the government.
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09-14-2011 12:07 by
SuthernFukr
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Wendy's idea of a medium could save an African village.
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09-14-2011 12:01 by
Doc Noland
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Stephen Hawking has a motor neurone disease that is related to amyotrophic lateral sclerosis, Thats not very smart, I wouldnt have done that!
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09-14-2011 12:00 by
Doc Noland
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I quit my job at the compass factory, I just felt like I needed to go in a new direction.
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09-14-2011 11:23 by
Deadman
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when people ask me if they are twins, Isay" no triplets", and I FREAK OUT and start looking for the missing one.
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09-14-2011 10:59 by
flingo
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Realistically most adults only need to know enough math to cheat the government once a year.
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09-14-2011 10:28 by
SuthernFukr
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As long as men have the ability to lie, I will never understand roofies.
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09-14-2011 10:25 by
SuthernFukr
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A dry sense of humor is better than slobbering all over the place.
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09-14-2011 10:23 by
SuthernFukr
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Quick question: If you're in a car with someone who talks a mile a minute, will going 60mph in reverse shut them up?
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09-14-2011 10:22 by
SuthernFukr
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Best breakup line - Our relationship is fat, its not working out.
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09-14-2011 10:18
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Daughter - IPod. Son - IPhone. Mom - iPad. Dad - I Pay.-_-
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09-14-2011 10:10 by
Bijoux
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At what point, did my pain become your pleasure?
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09-14-2011 09:40
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I can't afford an iPad so I got an iPatch instead.It's the pirate version ... Aarrrrrgggggghhhhhhh
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09-14-2011 09:27
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Things that must stop - Women drawing on their eyebrows and having to go to the bathroom just to change expressions.
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09-14-2011 09:21
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its hump day and I wanna be on top
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09-14-2011 09:20
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Karma is fair - you will get what you give.
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09-14-2011 09:00
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A Smart woman does not make babies with boyfriends.
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09-14-2011 08:43
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