Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

   Ok, so it's 2012. Shouldn't we be living like the Jetsons by now?

   I was standing in front of the mirror earlier, admiring my six pack for hours. Then I decide to put it back in the fridge and get a bottle of Champagne ... HAPPY NEW YEAR !!!!

   R.I.P to the virginitys about to be lost tonight.

   ‎2012 has arrived on schedule. Please wait until the New Year has come to a complete STOP before unfastening your seatbelts....

   Silly hairdresser, always puts my cape on backwards.

   Im pretty sure the Mayans' calendar is wrong, I mean they DISAPPEARED a thousand years ago.

   Gentlemen Never forget that a girl is your friend only until she finds a boyfriend.

   New Year Resolutions are silly to me. If you're not on the right path already, the change of a new year won't help. Its just another day, just a different number.

   Y2K EVERYONE! Y2K! Oh wait that was 12 years ago...

   That sad moment when it´s already new year in Portugal and everybody in my country and all around the all are partying really hard and I´m in home. In ther internet. Sadness. Fap time.

   Happy New Year everybody! I know its a bit early but I often suffer from premature congratulations!. :(

   its time to shuffle the deck and throw out all the jokers.

   I got a fresh loaf of bread now I'm ready for my new years toast.

   bringing my pet Mogwai with me to a New Years Eve party.

   BREAKING NEWS: Apple has announced that there will be no 2012, only 2011S.

   ...... OMG ...... forget about worrying about the end of the Mayan Calendar on 12-21-2012!!!! ..... I just noticed that my Staples Calendar ends TONITE!!!!! ........ YIKES!!!!

   I was standing in front of the mirror eariler, admiring my six pack for hours. But it got really warm so I put it back in the fridge. :(

   froget the world ending in 2012 , my inspection sticker ends in 2012!!

   Don't worry there are plenty other fish in the sea. None as attractive as the one that just dumped you but plenty other fish!

   my 2012 new year's resolution is to be more optimistic by keeping my cup half-full with either rum, vodka, or whiskey.