Tjshome.com
Funny Status Messages
Submit Status
TJ's Blog
Image Filters
Contact US
Funny Status Messages
|
Recent Comments
|
Submit a Status Message
Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump
View All Funny Status Messages
Sort:
Recent
|
Oldest
|
Rating
Trump Filter:
ON
|
OFF
Search Messages:
«Prev
«1
5328
5329
5330
5331
5332
5333
5334
5335
5593
Next»
Page: 5332 of 5593
Imagine the amount of money that could be raised if George Zimmerman volunteered to be the guy sitting on the dunk tank.
5
2
←Rate |
08-06-2016 14:25
Comments (
0
)
Do I just call you or should we resolve this quickly with 200 text messages?
10
2
←Rate |
08-06-2016 14:28
Comments (
0
)
90's road comics can now breathe a sigh of relief that their Clinton jokes are relevant again.
7
2
←Rate |
08-06-2016 14:30
Comments (
0
)
If you want to save money on a personal trainer, meet a girl who will break your heart.
3
1
←Rate |
08-06-2016 14:33
Comments (
0
)
I'm living off PB&J's so I think I accomplished the whole "be forever young" thing.
3
1
←Rate |
08-06-2016 14:34
Comments (
0
)
Just flew in, and boy are my arms tired from punching the reclined seat in front of me.
3
3
←Rate |
08-06-2016 14:35
Comments (
0
)
Living in New York City is having constant road rage even though you don't own a car.
5
2
←Rate |
08-06-2016 14:36
Comments (
0
)
If the IRS gave you the option to fight a bear to absolve your taxes I would at least take a week to think about it.
4
1
←Rate |
08-06-2016 14:37
Comments (
0
)
The internet is 90% complaining and entitlement and I hate it and I deserve better.
7
7
←Rate |
08-06-2016 14:39
Comments (
0
)
Putting broccoli between two slices of bread isn't a sandwich. It's an act of violence.
5
4
←Rate |
08-06-2016 14:40
Comments (
0
)
Donating blood again today. To my face. From my nose.
4
6
←Rate |
08-06-2016 14:41
Comments (
0
)
Status: Took vitamins in place of working out today.
3
3
←Rate |
08-06-2016 14:43
Comments (
0
)
If you want to recruit people to do whatever you tell them, get the ones eating fast food seafood.
3
8
←Rate |
08-06-2016 14:44
Comments (
0
)
Truly having the 'heart of a child' will lead you to a toothless life of homelessness.
6
4
←Rate |
08-06-2016 14:46
Comments (
0
)
People always talked about how fast technology advances. Has anyone ever thought, with this election coming up and all that is going on. We should be advanced enough to flea the planet?
2
12
←Rate |
08-06-2016 18:11 by
Creeooo
Comments (
0
)
Bought a crock pot today and suddenly realized I might not be the life of the party I thought I was.
7
2
←Rate |
08-06-2016 20:38
Comments (
0
)
The secret to a happy marriage is to completely master the "I'm listening" head nod while your wife is speaking....
5
2
←Rate |
08-06-2016 20:39
Comments (
0
)
In school they always called me a bookworm because I ate books.
3
4
←Rate |
08-06-2016 20:40
Comments (
0
)
Just got kicked out of Starbucks for not carrying a Macbook.
7
2
←Rate |
08-06-2016 20:40
Comments (
0
)
If you think it's impressive that the US got a gold medal in the air rifle event, just wait and see how they do in the mass shooting category!
10
20
←Rate |
08-06-2016 21:05
Comments (
0
)
«Prev
«1
5328
5329
5330
5331
5332
5333
5334
5335
5593
Next»
Submit your own funny facebook status message here:
Name:
Status Message:
X says
X is
X was
X has
X
...
characters left
Read the Rules
Site Links
Home
Funny Status Messages
Status Message Generator
TJ's Blog
About Tjshome
Contact Us
Privacy
© 1999 - 2021 Tjshome.com